I'm so sorry you lost your mum. I don't think it's something you ever get over. I lost my mum and dad within four days of each other. My mum died of cancer and my dad died of a broken heart a few days later. I was absolutely floored. The grief was overwhelming and still is. Even after a year has passed I still go to call my dad with every bit of news and get hit by the loss all over again. You never get over thst sort of loss but you do learn to cope. I still talk to my mum and dad at their grave and tell them what's been happening in my life but I know they already know. You know deep in your heart how proud of you your mum is, she doesn't have to physically be here for you to know and feel that. I do hope you find some peace but don't be afraid to grieve. Don't ever think you should be over it by now, it never goes away. When you feel sad think of silly memories that make you smile and when you have milestones in your life close your eyes and you will be able to hear your mums words of pride, you know in your heart exactly what she would say. Big love and hugs.  Xx