Cancer Research UK main site

Worried about my mum s health after my dads death

ATAY
Offline

Hi all, I'm here because I dont know where to turn. My dad passed away 1.7.21 from lung cancer, it was fairly quick and we knew he wouldn't get better so excepted the worst. 

As much as my mums accepted dads death and she kept herself busy going through his belongings and photos etc which has been fine but recently she really struggling with herself, her health isnt great, she has COPD and shes had awful reflux from the stress and lost weight which isnt good, shes very tiny already, her back is really bad and she feels the world is against her. Shes proactive in trying to find a solution, been to doctors, on medication for reflux and been to Osteopaths etc BUT I'm so worried for her mental health, I know if it wasnt for me she wouldn't be here. I dont know how to help! If I suggest therapy she'll say they cant help with her pain and health. I dont know what to do. 

  • Hello ATAY

    I'm sorry to hear that your Mum is struggling so much since the loss of your Dad. It's understandable that it's been a difficult time for you both. 

    You mention that she's already been to her GP etc regarding the physical pain that she's dealing with. I don't know if she's mentioned how much she is struggling mentally but it would certainly be a good idea for her to have a chat with the GP about this as well. Although they may not be able to help with her pain and health there will be things that they can recommend that may help her to better manage things. 

    If you think your Mum may be open to the possibility of grief counselling then you could have a look at the Cruse website to see what options are available to her for some support. 

    I do hope that you're able to get some support in place to better help your Mum cope with things. 

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator 

Speak to a nurse

Quick links

Follow us

Registered with Fundraising Regulator (logo)
Cancer Research UK is a registered charity in England and Wales (1089464), Scotland (SC041666), the Isle of Man (1103) and Jersey (247). A company limited by guarantee. Registered company in England and Wales (4325234) and the Isle of Man (5713F). Registered address: 2 Redman Place, London, E20 1JQ.