Moving away from bereaved parent

My Dad passed away two years ago -he was 54. My mum still struggles alot. 

My partner and I live at my mum's house (which was our family home with my dad). 

 

Recently, my partner and I have looked into buying our first home. We are looking at living a 45-1hour driving distance away. We want a different style of life.

 

I feel such guilt over leaving my mum. I always dreamed of having a close relationship with my parents especially for when I have kids of my own. Everyone in her life has left her or died. 

 

I know if my dad was still here this would all be okay. I don't know what to do and it is breaking my and her heart. 

  • Hello Abbie-C-12,

    Welcome to Cancer Chat.

    I'm very sorry to hear about your loss and how this is affecting your mum, it sounds like you're very close to her. It's natural to feel this way so it's important for you all to be open and honest together, if you haven't had a discussion already. It's such a difficult decision to make, but having those discussions will help everyone understand each other, whatever you decide to do. If your mum ever needs to speak to someone, the Cruse bereavement helpline is available on 0808 808 1677.

    All the best to you,

    Moderator Anastasia

  • Hi Abbie

    Is your mum on here?  I lost my husband 2 years ago and I have one of my children at university and my other is 18yrs soon she still lives at home but always out or in her bedroom.  I dread when the time comes and she goes too but I think as long as you are happy we as parents are happy too.  That doesnt sound too far away.  I got us a puppy not long after my husband passed away and she is amzing ! she gets me out we go out just the two of us and she makes me happy as has so much love.  I have never had a dog before so all new expereince.  Luckly I only work 3 days a week so I can spend a lot of time with her.  Im happy to chat to your mum on here.  All the best 

    Victoria x