Ive just read your post. So very sad. I have heard it can eat away from the outside before its terrible. 

Your marriage sounds just like ours, we also had 3 kids were soul mates did everything together and Ian was 57. Its horrific, no words can decribe the pain it leaves us in. We all need to carry on talking and helping each other. After all none of us ever thought we would be on this horrible path that looks like it never ends.

Big hugs  Debbie x

You know Gary where you get it from is beyond me but somewhere comes strength to put that one foot in front of the other every day.

Like you, Kev & I said 'think we are in for a bumpy ride' we had it, which was just the pits but nothing compared to what it's like now, whether the last year & last few weeks  have just been put to the back of my brain, who knows but boy I'm on some bumpy ride. 
The pain comes like a tsunami, it's unbearable, it's scary, it's fear & so it goes on.

Im destroyed too, im trying to survive & struggling & it's the bloody weekend :angry:hate weekends  

Im not preaching to you but find that fight in your belly & hug & kiss those children every minute you can. They will carry something of your wife in them & you will see it. 
My 3 kids are 31 & twins of 25 yrs & everyday I call them & text them all the time & when I see them I always say kisses & hugs are free today just like I said to Kevin everyday & they look at me like he did (I'm sure I get on their nerves) & there it is, they are just like him :love:

Im always up for a chat, to hear a rant, to off load to whatever it is just give me a nudge. Not that I know how the Private message but works 

x

Hi babyem

ive sent you a friend request 

Found it!! 

Hi Gary

So sorry for the loss of your lovely wife and I hope time heals your pain and you find peace again.

Im reading your story and replies totally terrified. My 27 year old beautiful son has been diagnosed with Oesophageal cancer in May. Again totally fit, climbing mountains and running marathons ! He's so loving and I'm so proud of him but we are on this awful journey and I feel totally lost I just cannot believe how our whole life has changed in the last 14 weeks. Callum is on his 3rd round of chemo , we had some good news last week, they said the cancer was responding to treatment and the cancer has cleared from his liver. The chemotherapy has been tough and made him poorly but I thought after this we could get back to some type of normal. He has been so brave and again never complained.  I'm so frightened now after reading people's awfully sad experiences.

callum has a younger sister , they have always been so close. I just don't understand why this would happen, the pain and fear I am feeling is unbearable. I just can't imagine my life without my son, surely I should go first it's just heartbreaking. 
 

Hiya Gary my heart goes out to you my husband passed away 10month ago and I cry everyday but not as much you take care of yourself annie x

Hi

i hope your one of the Lucky ones one thing I can say is keep on at the consultants to keep scanning your son and catch any change early 

i was told along with many others that the results after three months were really good.

we should be on holiday now and returning tomorrow for her six treatment scan on Wednesday instead it's my lovely wife's funeral on Friday it's so unfair I hate life and everything else 

but you really should keep on at the doctors and don't accept what I did