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Pancreatic cancer

pcam
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I was in a shop this week,and overheard a conversation.A freinds husband had just got a diagnosis of pancreatic cancer.He has 3 years to live.how they know this? I don't know but.........I had to leave the shop as my husband was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer last August and died in the November.But I felt SO angry that this man has 3 years but my beautiful husband just had a few months.I we never had the chance to talk,I was afraid to hold him as he was in pain,

I am ashamed that I felt this anger,as I would not want anyone to have such a devastating diagnosis.

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    My friend has just lost her husband of this awful disease and three months ago he seemed completely healthy. They had only two months from diagnosis and some of that was spent in hospital. She is in shock. Perhaps they soften the blow by giving a good prognosis but gradually things have a way of becoming clearer. I know my friend's husband was offered treatment and expected more time but this illness is fast.

    It is a struggle to come to terms with the loss of a beloved husband. Mine died eleven months ago and I still can't realise I will never see him again. Makes me feel I have never been supportive enough for others - it is true that we can't feel the grief until we have the experience ourselves. I wonder how long before I can talk about my husband without crying.

    Good luck and don't feel bad. We have to deal with our grief in our own way.

  • Offline in reply to Ronnie46

    I just feel so lost........But I know I have to carry on,not move on,

  • Offline in reply to pcam

    We do have to carry on and savour the lovely memories even though they make us cry.  There isn't much else we can do but make sure we talk about them to friends and family so they are not forgotten.

  • Offline in reply to Ronnie46

    It's just SO unfair,life,never did I think when we were bopping to the Rolling Stones,that he would die and in such pain

  • Offline in reply to pcam

    It is unfair. I never saw myself as a widow. We had plans and I'm sure you did too.

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    Hi pcam, I'm so sorry for your loss.

    I lost my Dad a few weeks ago to pancreatic cancer, one month after diagnosis.

    I'm no medical professional but for all the research I have done on the disease, it seems that the survival rate is low, and it has to be caught very early for any hope of a cure. All the other stories I've read on this forum of pancreatic cancer seem to involve loved ones that only lasted weeks or months from diagnosis, so it does seem suprising for someone to be told they have 3 years? Maybe they caught it early and were told best case scenario they might have 3 years left? I suppose it would all depend on when they are diagnosed. Some people may leave it until their pain and symptons are very bad before they seek medical help and then find out they don't have long left, like my Dad did. If he had gone to the doctors a few months earlier when he started losing his appetite and having stomach pain etc. then he would have found out earlier and had 'more time' left, when really it wouldn't have been more time, just simply diagnosed earlier, as there was no cure. Not sure what the better scenario is there. To carry on as normal and then be told you have 1 month left. Or to find out earlier and be told you have e.g. 6 months left. In any case, what a horrible disease. Wish they could find a way to diagnose and treat it better.

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