Syringe Driver End of Life

Hi I need clarity my mum just past away. She had suspected lung infection. She was 86 years old. She was barely eating. But she had build up drink OK. The doctors put her on a syringe driver I sat by her bedside day and night while she struggled to breath until her heart stopped. It's the worst experience I've witnessed not only because it's my mum. It's the way she died. I want to no if the morphine is just for pain why did my mum's body was limp like a person in a coma as soon as she had the morphine. I feel they overdosed her and killed her slowly.wasn't allowed to feed her or give her water. So she would have died anyway of thirst and food. I had to suffer her gasping for every breath for 4 days with the morphine. I was her carer for 3 years. And all I can see is my mother dying in agony yes agony all her body she couldn't move apart from her eye lids once every few minutes. And eyes open and mouth open all the time. I want people honest opinion there was no x-ray done on my mum. 

  • Hello Paddyjack1,

    I'm so sorry for your loss and can imagine that her last moments would be especially painful for you. You may have questions, but your mum's medical team would have done all they can to make her comfortable. In you're struggling there is support out there, there is some advice here and you can speak to someone on the Cruse bereavement helpline 0808 808 1677.

    Thinking of you,

    Moderator Anastasia

  • Paddyjack1 I am sorry for your loss you must be struggling right now, but please know that time will heal yes it's a cliché but true.

    At the risk of increasing your pain I understand where you are coming from and obviously after looking after your mum as a carer for 3 years no one can appreciate the pain you are going through at the moment.

    In 1997 at 68yrs old my father had bowel cancer with a diagnosis of 6 months to live before chemo he ended up in hospital. Some nurses are excellent and some are appalling. The nurse overdosed him with morphine and he woke up 18 hours later unable to eat or drink, they didn't offer him any food anyway. We gave him droplets of water but swallowing was painful. He died a day or two later. This obviously is not the forum for discussing the rights and wrongs of the NHS. I just wanted to say that this sort of thing does happen more than we realize.

    It is not your imagination your instincts are correct. Rather than hinder your grieving process I hope it helps to realise that your point has been understood. Although a more pleasant ending for your mother would have assisted your grieving process, as you would have felt she was ready or she would have had the opportunity to tell you when she was ready to go.

    If you feel strongly enough there are processes you can use to complain.

    Whatever you decide to do I wish you luck and God bless  

    Elle