I'm so sorry for your loss.  I haven't experienced the same but I couldn't pass by your post without sending you my deepest sympathy and best wishes.
It's all so new and raw.  I'm sure you will find strength to cope in the future, but at the moment you need to give yourself time to grieve.   

I hope you will soon have responses from others on here who know exactly what you're going through.  

Hello Busby666

I'm so sorry to hear that your husband passed away yesterday. I know from your previous posts just how much you love him and how desperately you wished there were more treatment options available for him. It's undoubtedly an incredibly difficult time for you right now. 

Grief is a natural process, but it can be devastating. When a spouse dies it is likely to be one of the most intense emotional experiences of your lifetime. Whatever way you would describe your relationship, it is a huge loss in your life. Your world as you knew it has changed, and it can be incredibly painful. 

I'd encourage you to have a look at the Cruse website. They are a charity that supports bereaved people and have lots of information about grief that you may find helpful in the coming days, weeks, and months. If, or when, you feel that the time is right to speak to someone about all that you've been through then they also offer bereavement counselling. I know that many of our members here have found this kind of support helpful in their journey through grief. 

For now, keep talking Busby666; to those around you, to friends and family, to the community here at Cancer Chat. Take things a day at a time. If a day is too much then just focus on getting through each hour. And most importantly of all, be kind to yourself. 

I'm sure that others who have lost loved ones will post to share their advice and support as well. 

Best wishes, 
Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator