My mum passed away on the 31st March, from a short battle with Advanced bowel cancer. She was diagnosed in February 21, and deteriorated quickly after that. She was 55 when she passed away, and I am 27.
When I think of potentially living the next 30-40 years without her, I feel overwhelmed with grief. I miss her so much. I miss being able to talk to her and see her. It's been the longest I've ever gone without talking to her or seeing her, and I don't want to do it for the rest of my life.
I've gone back to work, and although it distracts me to an extent. I feel like something is missing. I don't know how I will do life without her. It's not about doing life without her, I don't want to either. Is it bad, I don't even care about living anymore?
What's worse, I feel like I have so much grief left in me, I don't know how to get it all out. I just feel weird.
I don't know how to move forward. I feel like someone has ripped a part of me out, and I can't function with it.
I just can't believe, my beautiful mum is gone. I look at her pictures, and it's like I've almost forgotten she had cancer and she was very poorly. I just remember how she was before her illness. My god I miss her so much.
