I can't believe I am writing this but I feel I need some answers. I have just lost my darling father to cholangiocarcinoma last week. He was a strong man up until December, always in the garden, decorating and building things. Unfortunately, due to lockdown and my mum undergoing chemo I never saw him since Aug. I feel so guilty for that now.
I could see on zoom at end of Dec he was ill and by early Jan he was hospitalised. None of us knew why, just he said something was wrong. A couple of days later he called in tears telling me he was going to die. I could not believe it. He apparently had gallbladder and liver cancer.
Days later he came home and eventually he was told he would be stented two weeks later. I wanted it sooner but they said there were no spaces available for the procedure. He came home so jaundiced and weak. He went back to hospital where he was told he would have the stent. After a few more days of us waiting and not knowing and being told on Thursday night he was having the procedure on the Friday morning they called that afternoon and said that they were sorry but he actually had cholangiocarcinoma and it had spread and he had a few days left.
We nursed him at home with help of Marie curie and he left us a couple of weeks later. Every day he deteriorated more so we had no real time as he slept for nearly 22 hours and became progressively weaker. I told him I adored him, but the decline was so quick. I can't get my head around how it happened so quickly. I know about pancreatic cancer having a poor prognosis but never heard of bile duct cancer.
I guess I want to know is how did my darling father not know something so serious was wrong. And I asked the Drs and they said his bilirubin level changed overnight, but surely there must have been other signs.
I am grief stricken. My heart is aching and I can't make sense of it. I never write on forums but maybe someone can help.
I still have my mother with lymphoma awaiting a PET scan. It just feels too much.
thank you for listening.
