I lost my wife to cancer recently and I have never felt so alone. I am experiencing all kinds of extreme emotions from grief to guilt. I really want to connect and talk to others who have been through this terrible period.
Hi I seem to be going backwards is the best way to describe things I was told do one day at a time and things should get better I seem to be getting worse? I'm still very much in denial hate living but have to for the kids when I play tractors with Jack my 2 year old I sometimes switch off and smile maybe will laugh then I feel guilty for doing that when my wife has died I now she would love me playing with him I get that why was she taken From me ???
Hi Debbie, bit better now after 2 glasses of wine - seems to be the only thing that can stop my mind going into overdrive.
The only other thing that helps is talking to people - walking does help a bit but everywhere I still see Rossella.
Just about managing but I don't know how. I just can't wait to go find her in the afterlife. It is one of the things that calms me down - the thought of joining her soon.
Hi mate I'm I'm on the wine two! I completely agree I see my wife every were to For instance I went to Tesco express to get my wineand cried all the way home thinking that my wife will never go to that Tesco express again Or drive down this road crazy really I never fought my mind could be so powerful x
Hi.. I lost my husband on Tuesday morning and I feel like this pain will never go away. I actually stopped crying today and now feel numb and guilty for not crying.. he was diagnosed with a possible oesophagus cancer 2 weeks ago and went in for a day procedure a week last Thursday and never came home.
He was my everything for 21 years ... covid ruined any chance I had of been with him for the last 4 days..
Like you can't see a way out.. but these wonderful brave people on here im sure will help us xx
Hi Penny, I can totally imagine and feel your pain and so sorry that this happened so fast for you - looks like out of the blue.
I so get you on the crying thing and feeling guilty for not doing it. It's a bit like with my Dad when he tries to make a joke I feel guilty for making a smile and quickly stop. Also don't want any of Rossella's stuff moved in any way - get upset if things are moved around.
Once again I am really sorry for you and I am feeling everything you are going through. We somehow have to grasp hold of all the good memories where we can as in this situation the emotions are completely overwhelming.
So sorry for your loss, this must be horrific as its happened so fast.
I lost my husband in June to oesephagus cancer Unfortunately you can have this type along time with no symptoms. We was a year exactly from finding out. Worst year of our lives.
Theres no words to ease your pain and you right it feels like we are on a dead end path all of us, but keep chatting on here it really does help has we all feel the same,
I hope you ok mate I'm a bit better than yesterday i'm going to talk to a therapist later i've got to give someone a try I'm struggling to cope with the fact that's it she is gorn forever in the way we want her x
Very very hard to except what was said if I'm honest! You basically get told stuff you don't wanna hear not really! I was told a lot of comforting things like
1 my wife is up in the sky cancer free safe and well watching over us or very close by even in time properly since her, she's with me apparently she will never leave my side especially her children she will do anything to defend them!
2 very hard one to accept. It was just her time to move up to heaven (nothing anyone can do you can change that)
3 make sure she is not forgotten my wife in heaven doesn't need a big headstone on the grave but the family may want that as a way of remembering! Also talk to the kids as much as you can about mummy but don't start too soon may just upset kids!
4 mine and my children's life will change forever!
5 my wife lives on through us
6 hard one but true past is the past it can't be changed but nothing can take your memories away absolutely nothing at all
7 live your live we weren't meant to die not yet it's not our time so don't just sit and wait for the time try and liveEveryone deserves to be happy if your happy you have a happy wife!
8 Don't be scared what other people think of you whatever you do in the future is what you do no one else can tell you otherwise !
9 somehow piece of this advice together in time not yet as it's far too early and we have to properly grieve first x
