So sorry for your loss. I lost my husband in June and it still feels like yesterday, the emptiness and feeling so alone is terrible. 

Chatting on here to people does help, having your family and friends close will also help but very difficult in lockdown, 

I went back to work and try and keep myself busy all the time to keep my mind active.

seek counselling through your GP it might help you alot.

take care

Debbie x

Yes it is the emptiness and loneliness which is brutal.

I realized a few days ago that until I met Rossella I had always somehow felt alone - she completed me.

I was blessed that she fell into my life.

There were still so many incomplete communications before she passed and that is very hard for me.

It just happened so fast.

The thought of going back to work is really tough but I guess in the end it will help me to distract my mind. 

I am really afraid that my life now is going to be about seeking distractions from this hell.

Yes it is the emptiness and loneliness which is brutal.

I realized a few days ago that until I met Rossella I had always somehow felt alone - she completed me.

I was blessed that she fell into my life.

There were still so many incomplete communications before she passed and that is very hard for me.

It just happened so fast.

The thought of going back to work is really tough but I guess in the end it will help me to distract my mind. 

I am really afraid that my life now is going to be about seeking distractions from this hell.

Yes i think you are right it is hell and trying to keep occupied is hard.

Going back to work is daunting but the best decision i made to be honest it has helped me alot.

I was already Furloughed from March up to him passing away because when covid hit they stopped his treatment and had to sheild.

So glad you did find each other just so sad you had to part. Its a very cruel world. 

The saying is life goes on but its not easy.

take care x

Did you have a good day today?

Yes been to work,

I work in a Building Society so classed has key workers, still have to stay open during lockdown. 

Alittle bit boring due to people staying at home so not as busy.

How you been today? hope it's not been too bad and you've managed to go a walk? 

Well that's good you are still working and keeping yourself busy.

My morning and afternoon was really hard to be honest - plenty of crying. The evenings seem to be better and my parents are a good distraction.

Not managed to take a walk as my elderly parents are very fearful about me getting too close to anyone.

I hope you are ok.

Xx

Im 6 months in and still have days where im inconsolable.

It comes in waves has time moves on. Good and bad days if ya know what i mean. 

Its part of grieving especially for you its very early days.

Glad you have company of your parents and you are not alone  

Take one day at a time thats how im getting through.

take care

Hi how are you today. I have read some of the tail end of this thread and it is desperately sad what you are going through.

My lovely wife died in June 2018 so I'm a little way down this uneviable path. I won't say it is "any better" because this grief is something that you carry with you. It's the missing and loneliness that gets to me, and the music that can in a way be happy/sad.

Remember that grief isn't forever but love is.

Chris xx

That is so true Chris. You are a couple years  further down the line and i understand what you are saying. It is tea time onwards thats worse for me, because through the day we was both at work so i can still keep busy in the day. 

Now i come home to a empty dark house and i hate it. It is very lonely and the music gets me everytime. Ian loved music and knew just about every record ever made so he always had something belting out and him singing along its them times i so miss.

Yes love is forever and we will never forget our loved ones. 

Keep going, take care 

Debbie x  

Hi Debbie,

Have you ever had bereavement counselling and if you did how did you find it? I find listening to music a double edged sword either happy or sad. I understand what you say about an empty house.....my son who lives with me was away for a week last year and it was strange and lonely and quite upsetting. I can't begin to know what it is like for you on a permanent basis.

If you want to contact me please DM me.

Chris x

Ive sent you a friends Request so i can message you Chris