Lost my wife to Brest cancer 5 days ago age39

Never done anything like this  before but been told talking can help. I lost my wife 5 days ago  wife was only 39 she left behind two young boys ages 9 and 2  she had Brest cancer  and after a long battle she lost the fight. Now it's just   me I some how have to be a mum  and dad and keeping strong for the kids  with all the mummy in hevan  and will always be with us but all I want  to do is to kiss her lips and cuddle once more.     29/12/20 day 8  of this nightmare children seem to be dealing with all this ok ish! 2 year old asked for mummy ever time the phone rings had to bath him without mummy for the first time  that was very hard but I think harder for me than him 9 year old very quiet always playing mine craft  but does stop and talk  about mummy when feeling sad with is hard but lovely at the same time. Going forward I'm thinking of doing a memory jar  so we can Remember things  about  mummy not sure what else I can do? 9/2/21 sorted all the funeral stuff out music photos etc not a job anymore want to do  it's all just a daze! Sometimes at night I here her talking to me  so I sleep well and morning comes and I'm hit by that train again  just going round and round 

  •  I'm sure The funeral will be perfect  for Lewis  your doing such a great job and seem to be handling things pretty ok to I have nothing but respect for you all journeys are so alike! I guess I should leave you to your painting  i'm here if you need me

  • The sleeping tablets definitely help, I'm so tired during the day so I am not getting as emotional all the time. I've been making progress with the diamond painting, done maybe another inch along the bottom, my pain by numbers kits arrived too, canvas but they are massive they may take a while. I'm just watching the new Wonder Woman film on amazon prime it's good. How was your day? 

  • I think your the strongest out of all of us maybe you are Wonder Woman I'm not good today I found an old phone that had loads of photos of me and my wife onI can't remember the password now it says connect to iTunes and I haven't got a clue what her password is 

  • I would not say I'm the strongest at all, I'm just coping right now. I know I struggle when I don't sleep generally so having a good nights sleep is good for me right now. 

    Lewis got an iPhone 11 in November it has Face ID on it and he put my face on it so I can access all his accounts and stuff. Lucky he did but I knew his passcode anyway. If you are able to get into your wife's email you might be able to reset the iTunes password? 

  • Yeah that's a good idea I'll try and sort it out and look for her emails I know she had loads of email addresses so maybe a needle in the haystack but worth a try.I'm glad you're coping today and I'm glad Lewis put his face on the iPhone for you but I guess you being a girl had all the passwords anyway like you said it's just as boys so don't do things like that we seem to live on our own little world basically you're absolutely useless about our partners

  • I think when it asks for the iTunes password it has the email address in the little box so it should help narrow down what one your looking for.

    lewis said when he was at home, I need to write down all the passwords, he never got round to it but that does not matter. Lewis was a window cleaner for his brothers company but before that he done graphic design and website building, he built his brothers websites and obviously his brother did not want to lose them, I managed to find where he paid for the hosting of the pages by trawling through his emails and found the website passwords in his google drive so we have managed to keep them going which is good, the payments for keeping the websites online are now paid by the brother. 
     

    I'm actually terrible at passwords I always forget them! 

  • No it just saying on the Home Screen

           Time date

     

    iPhone is disabled

    Connect to iTunes

     

    emergency that's it  don't want to reset it because it's connected to the iCloud as well again she knows all the passwords just when we thought life couldn't get any more complicated.Well done for sorting out all the problems for the website you must be good on computers after lockdown I'll ask you to come and fix my phone 

  • No im not that good with the technical support. 
     

    im sure there is a way someone will know how. 

  • Your right in the time I just love to see them again I'm off to bed now night night x