Lost my wife to Brest cancer 5 days ago age39

Never done anything like this  before but been told talking can help. I lost my wife 5 days ago  wife was only 39 she left behind two young boys ages 9 and 2  she had Brest cancer  and after a long battle she lost the fight. Now it's just   me I some how have to be a mum  and dad and keeping strong for the kids  with all the mummy in hevan  and will always be with us but all I want  to do is to kiss her lips and cuddle once more.     29/12/20 day 8  of this nightmare children seem to be dealing with all this ok ish! 2 year old asked for mummy ever time the phone rings had to bath him without mummy for the first time  that was very hard but I think harder for me than him 9 year old very quiet always playing mine craft  but does stop and talk  about mummy when feeling sad with is hard but lovely at the same time. Going forward I'm thinking of doing a memory jar  so we can Remember things  about  mummy not sure what else I can do? 9/2/21 sorted all the funeral stuff out music photos etc not a job anymore want to do  it's all just a daze! Sometimes at night I here her talking to me  so I sleep well and morning comes and I'm hit by that train again  just going round and round 

  • Men only that way be good for me but maybe not is I like talking to the lady s  but will the lady s juge me I don't know maybe one day 

    He must of seen you in the shower loads 

  • There's no judgment, obviously I don't know what goes on in men's groups but I'm sure there are guys in the same situation as you. 

  • I'm going to give it a go  thanks for that  

  • I'm going to give it a go thank you 

  • Hi cris..I lost my mum 030318 she was my rock my world..I suffer mental health so even tho I'm 50 now I was her little girl..I have 2 grown children it's only now I feel guilty that my children had to deal with me my son's 24 my daughter 25 I don't think they mourned their nana..I've never done this before  write on the internet..my mum beat cancer 4 times but it took my queen in the end..liver..lung..white cell and liver cancer..we found out 6th of August(my dad's birthday) and was took march..I have had cancer twice and not feeling great at the mo..waiting for results that's why I came on here...glad I did..anyway your situation is heart breaking as I've been through losing the love I of my life all I can tell you is time..everybody deals with losing a loved one in their own way..mine was drunk taking friends grandchild on holidays decorating transforming my queens garden..I don't really remember my queens day as I was on zanex and alcohol...I live in her house..I moved in the day she got sick..today I phoned estate agent to sell  I can't move on while I sleep in her bed cook in her kitchen and even going loo..wow this is the first time I've spoke about how I feel ...because of your message...so thankyou..what I want to say to you is your children will be ok sooner than you..a memory box is a great idea..I've done that for my granddaughter..I actually  smile laugh have fun and I'm ok..I never thought I'd be happy again. But my darling you will in your own time..I used to look at old lady's and think why did my mum leave at 63 and your still here..which is messed up...so go with your feelings what ever they are..I even split with my partner of 8 years as i wouldn't let him sleep in my mums room..your children will be ok I promise you..I feel someone at the bottom of my bed sometimes and once my leg got pulled..I pretend she's living in Spain as we had an apartment there..which I sold as I couldn't go back there..I regret it now..so no rash decisions..sorry I've wrote so much..your in my thoughts..you and your babies will get through this....stay strong x. Oh and my queen was called cris..

  • Not yet but I will go to bed soon 

  • I'm having a bad time I can't sit  still I can't  handle  his  why why all the goes through my head 

  • Have you talked to your GP? They might be able to help, hopefully a good nights sleep makes things more bareable 

  • Thank you for your text I'm just going day by day but it's so hard miss her so much why have to die at 39  we had just started our lives again