11 Weeks from Diagnosis to Passing

Dad was diagnosed on the 29th Sepetember 2020 having one day out of the blue complaining of abdominal pain. After some scans it was found to be a blockage in his bowel which was a large tumour. 
Surgery allowed my dad to continue living via a stoma, and more tests and scans revealed it was Stage 4 with advanced metastasis to both the Liver and Kidneys. 
We were sat down in a room and told dad was terminal and there was little we could stop to now control the cancer, although cemo was offered we didn't take it as the quality of life was have seriously been impacted for what the doctors warned was actually very little extension in terms of time. 
 

Dad was broadly ok until December and he was still quite active, but the last 2/3 weeks saw rapid decline as the cancer accelerated at an uncontrollable rate. He was virtually sleeping all day, and once awake was on so many drugs to keep his organs functioning that he would fall asleep sitting in the chair or on the edge of the bed. 
 

Covid meant I've been working from home since March so I would sit with dad whilst working, listen to the radio or watch our beloved Manchester United play. 
 

Dad passed away at home on Tuesday with me, my sister and mum all holding his hand as he peacefully passed away. I take some comfort from the fact dad usb is free from all pain and suffering, which was awful to see in the final days. 
 

He was 62 and largely had no symptoms whatsoever ever. Regrettably his missed a bowel screening a few years back and never rearranged - likely he may have thought it was too invasive, that screening very well may have saved his life. 
 

He's left behind me (30), my sister (28) and mum (57) behind, which a massive hole now in our lives. 
 

We all feel so empty, and miss dad so much. We've got lots of photos abs videos, but I can never feel the touch of his soft hands and tight hug he'd give me whenever I came home. I miss him incredibly and would give anything for one more day with him!

I've posted this to share my story and maybe find other people that going through the same thing - it might just help the make the healing easier to know I'm not alone. 
 

Thankyou, Tom

  • Hi Tom,

    i am so so incredibly sorry to hear the news of your dad passing away. It sounds like yourself and your family did a wonderful job of looking after him at home and keeping him comfortable. You have done your dad proud.

    I sadly lost my amazing dad and my biggest supporter in October following a two week diagnosis with a rare form of cancer. I've lost the man who helped me with everything and my first love in life. My dad was 58 and left me (32) my brother and my mum behind. We are all devestated at losing our best friend in life. 

    This year has been horrendous with covid and now we have both lost our dads. It's just so unfair. Christmas time is so hard also. I can't think of celebrating and just want to hide away from the world. 

    I hope you and your family and keeping strong and remember what an amazing job you have done.

     

    so so sorry to hear your news again.