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Missing Dad still hurts

CPoppy
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I lost my 65 year old Dad at the start of lock down to osophegal cancer, 8 months on we are finally able to bury his ashes in 2 days time. My heart breaks not to have him here, he was my support, the one person who truly got me and I got him. I am now 30 and my life feels turned upside down. During his 10 months of illness I was so busy, putting Dad first, it felt good to help. I feel weighed down and emotional that I cant do anything to help him now, even though I know that sounds silly. I want to make everything alright but know that I can't. I feel emotional with the build up to Friday. It feels like the final step to lay him to rest. I miss him so much and hope he knows I love him. I wanted to get this down to share my feelings, so sad to lose an amazingly kind person.

Parents
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    Hi CPoppy, I lost my dad at the end of July to oesophogial cancer, with secondary tumours. He was 59, I'm 37. I feel like I was in a similar situation to you. I helped, took him to chemo, was there in general as much as I could with the lockdown, I was there when he died. I have this unbelievable guilt weighing me down that I could have done better. I hope, in time, we can start to heal. Sending lots of love xx

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    Hi CPoppy, I lost my dad at the end of July to oesophogial cancer, with secondary tumours. He was 59, I'm 37. I feel like I was in a similar situation to you. I helped, took him to chemo, was there in general as much as I could with the lockdown, I was there when he died. I have this unbelievable guilt weighing me down that I could have done better. I hope, in time, we can start to heal. Sending lots of love xx

Children
  • Offline in reply to Chrissy_B

    Hi Chrissy, thank you for your kind words, I feel my Dad is now at rest and as I now have somewhere to visit I think this may help me in time to come. So sorry to hear you have been on a similar journey, such unbelievable sadness one can experience. Try not to feel guilty, its easy to look back and think of the things you could have done differently, i've thought that about a few things. Take care too Xxx

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