I haven't wrote on here in recent months.

I was busy spending time with my Mum until the end. Although, it ended much sooner than we thought. We thought it would be a long journey watching her suffer, instead, one night, she just passed, in her sleep. And that was that.

The funeral was a couple of weeks ago now. And we're left to deal with the fallout. Life goes on as they say.

Another reason that I've not wrote on here is that I really didn't feel the need to. I've been dealing with this all emotionally better than I ever thought I would. Especially as I suffer from emotional instensity issues, which I receive treatment for. I've been emotionally the strongest of all my family.

I go through moments, don't get me wrong, where I feel the gap, the hole. I cry. And I miss my Mum terribly.

The main thing however, which I'm struggling with, it the seemingly physical symptoms which I am encountering. Many years ago, I used to suffer severe anxiety and panic attacks, which brought a range of horrendous physical sensations. It was difficult at times to realise that your body could create these, despite not having a virus, bacterial infection or disease causing them.

I seem to be struggling with exhaustion, severe fatigue. I get through one or two days then bam, I find myself needng to sleep half the day or staying in, not being able to work or even go to the shops really. It's very frustrating. If it's not enough to feel so sad and just be allowed to get on, my body is shutting me down too. And I'm assuming it's the grief causing this.

Has anyone else suffered like this?