Hello,

My lovely Mum was diagnosed with liver cancer in April 19. She passed away at home with my Dad and all of us 4 children with her in Feb this year. We had her funeral in March, one week later lockdown came in. I didn't see Dad from then until mid June as he was shielding. He struggled a lot, him and Mum had been together for 50 years and no-one could see him as he was shielding.

Dad was admitted to hospital at the start of June, he was covid negative then. However he came out and a week and a half later he was found at home in a bad way. He passed away in hospital alone on Fathers day because then he was covid positive and this aggravated his underlying conditions.

Me and my siblings have become adult orphans in less than 4 months, Dad's funeral is in 2 weeks time. It's the same funeral home, same chapel of rest, same crematorium for both Parents. We're doing the funeral arrangements twice and we have the whole house to clear and put up for sale now. I also live over 100+ miles away.

Dad's death was unexpected, Mum's wasn't as she was terminal...hers did progress so so quickly near the end but now I find my grief is stronger. I'm not crying all day but I think that's because I'm getting on with paperwork and going back to clear the house. I've had 2 weeks off of work, my job involves speaking about financial matters when people pass away and also taking medical info including cancer aswell as the conditions Dad had. There's so much to do and I don't feel ready to even start dipping back into work again. I would like to stay off after the funeral because there's so much to do and I feel exhausted from driving, clearing and not sleeping well. I can afford to have unpaid leave (the last 2 weeks were paid) but does this sound silly? I just feel that with the house, wanting to see Dad in the chapel of rest and general associated bits and pieces work is something I could do without til after the funeral. How do I explain this to my work? My leader has been amazing and I don't want to be seen as taking advantage. Being truthful with myself means I feel I need to put myself first at the minute,