Hi Fifi,

I am so sad to hear of the loss of your grandparents, from the sound of your pain it seems as if they were gorgeous wonderful people whom clearly loved you dearly. 

Grief is a funny one and can take so many different forms. I want you to take comfort in that what you are feeling is very natural and is only a testament to the love that was there and still remains there. Being scared of other loved ones passing is also a very natural reaction one which i also felt when my dad died 

From experience, and I know so many can agree, the pain and loss will feel less harsh and heartbreaking as time goes by. However talking to friends family and professionals has certainly helped me ease the pain. I would stronge urge you to do so too! Allow yourself to reminisce and grieve. 

Sending big hugs, you are so strong!!

lots of love,

Jenny