Just lost my mum

My mum died 26th March this year after battling overian cancer. She battled the disease for nearly 2 years and when she was 1st diagnosed it was to cure but after major surgery and chemo it came back and she was given 6-12 months. We are a close family and we understood but nothing can prepare you for when your mum is taken from you. I know it’s early days and I know it will take time but I feel so lost without her.

I gave up work to be with her and my dad so we could make even more special moments together and towards the end my dad and I took care of her. She wanted to die at home so we made sure we did exactly what my mum wanted. Now she’s gone I can’t sleep, barely eat and feel at a loss (I was with my parents nearly every day). I am married with a child and they do support and love me but I need my mum, we are all grieving but I feel I need to hear from others in my situation and I know it’s many x

  • Hello Lisais2

    I'm sorry to hear that your Mum recently passed away. Understandably it's avery difficult time for you and I hope that some of our members here who have also lost loved ones will be long soon to post and share their experiences with you. 

    You may find it helpful to have a look at the Cruse Bereavement website here and this page on our website. 

    Sending best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator

     

     

  • Hi

    i’m so sorry to hear about your mum. My mam passed away in January after a short but brilliant battle against oesophageal cancer.

    i was with my mam everyday. She loved with me and I stayed off work to be with her.

    I’m very similar to you, I needed my mam so badly afterwards. My husband and son were great but I was just heartbroken. TBH I still am but it’s a little better and I’m sure it will continue to but there are many times during the day where I could break down and cry. 90% of the time I don’t because I’m in work or with my son but you must grieve and talk about your mum as much as possible.

    Im so sorry you’re going through this. My thoughts are with you. Please message me if you need to.

     

    tricia x

  • Hi there 

    another lovely person lost to this disease. So many of our wonderful parents become ill or die from this cancer monster. My mum is now facing her hardest fight. Colorectal cancer at age 72. We are all devastated and unsure if Mum will be strong enough we are hoping and praying she will.

    like you I have a great partner and daughter they love me and I love them but no one replaces a mum. This has been the hardest year in my whole life and this virus isn't helping matters.
     

    Take care and allow yourself to grieve for your mum. I am already grieving for the healthy happy and vibrant mum I had only earlier this year.

  • Hi, I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm 24 I lived just me and my mum at home and I lost her on the 20th March to Covoid 19 & terminal breast cancer. She was my world and I am hugely struggling. I know what it's like to be with someone everyday and suddenly they are not there. It is pain like I never knew existed. I have siblings and we are are all grieving hugely but the current situation in the world certainly doesn't allow you to grieve in a normal way. I hope you and you're family are ok and stick together. I feel like there is no air left to breath without her here on earth. It's the most heartbreaking physical pain, and there's so much more that folllows. Regret of the things you said or didn't say and I keep thinking about her last days on earth and how horrible and lonely they were for her. And my heart hurts even more. I am sending love to you and hoping that if other people survive this loss I can too x

  • Hi JCAngel

    i know what you're going through my mother is deteriorating rapidly due to diagnosis of terminal colorectal cancer the doctors don't care they just told her she's dying ! She can't see us because of this damn virus and my husband and myself are in bits. She's getting infection after infection all the time now and the nurse called tonight to tell me they won't resuscitate if she gets worse. I mean such a blow as she was first only in hospital with mild pneumonia which turned out to be breathing problems culminating from this bloody cancer even though apparently it isn't on her lungs. Her liver is in a bad way though I think. I am just heartbroken and it doesn't feel real I feel so exhausted yet I can't sleep in case they ring tell me she's passed away. I wish she'd been operated on as soon as the diagnosis was made. It'd have at least given her more time and made her more comfortable. They just left her and now they made her sign a DNR because she's 72 and has cancer. It's awful. Horrible hospital . I am certainly going to someone higher up about the way she's been treated. I am so sad for myself and all those who are going through this. Cruel times we are in.