Hello Lucy14

I wanted to post a reply to you to say how very sorry I was to read about your Mum. It's never easy to lose someone you love and even more so when you're so  young. I'm sure it's been an incredibly difficult time for you. Well done for being brave enough to reach out for support. 

You mention that you feel as if nothing is getting easier. It's natural that you want to talk about your Mum. Have you seen a counsellor? I think it's something that you might find helpful. You could have a look at this website called Hope Again. They also have details of a freephone number on their website that you can call to speak to someone. 
You might also be inerested in looking at a site called RipRap which is specifically a site for young people. They have a forum where you'll be able to connect with others your age who have lost a parent to cancer. 

I know that it may feel difficult but do talk to an adult close to you and let them know how you're feeling. I don't know if you're able to talk to your Dad, an Aunt or Uncle, maybe your Grandparents. If you don't feel able to talk to them then speak to one at school. Either your form teacher or a support worker. 

I hope that some of this information helps Lucy. It does get easier as time goes on but it also helps to talk to someone. 

Best wishes, 
Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator