mums dying at 53

so last year my mum was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer in her lymph nodes, she underwent treatment which they called a 'success' fast forward to a year later, the cancer is back only this time, in her lungs, liver and bones- it's too advanced they can't cure it.

only last month my mum was talking to us and laughing, now she's on her hospital bed unable to breathe, speak or move, they don't think she's going to survive the night.

dealing with this are her 4 kids who are aged 17, 20, 25 and 34

has anyone got any advice for us that can help us through this difficult time.

Offline Louiseann over 6 years ago

You poor thing i feel for you. While your mum is still here try and use that time and spend it with her. I wish i could say more to help you through this. Try and stay strong and take it one step at a time. Big hugs xxx
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Offline Edlisam over 6 years ago

My mum died two weeks ago as a result of glioblastoma (brain cancer) and was unconscious for a short while beforehand. I found it helpful just to say things out loud - talk to her about every day things, tell her how much you love her, tell her anything you feel but haven't said or just tell her how much you'll miss her and that you'll all look after each other. I'm 34 and my sister and I were aware of how little time my mum had left but it is still incredibly painful when the time comes. I don't know if my mum heard me in those last hours but I know it has provided me with some comfort and I hope it did the same for her.
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Offline Pepperplant over 6 years ago

I'm truly sorry you are all in this incredibly difficult and heartbreaking situation. I just lost my mum on Wednesday. The advice I would share with you echoes that of the posters . Tell her you love her , i told mum she was doing a good job and that she could let go- that she didn't need to fight it anymore, tell her who is there with her hold her hand, gently stroke her head ,
However you respond to the moment of her passing..... go with it.
Depending on where you are hospital, home or hospice ... mum was at home but wanted to go to a hospice . Unfortunately there were no beds available. Something told me in the preceding 24 hours that her time was closer. Reach out for support from the nurses if you can . I felt quite alone being at home not knowing if how mum was presenting was part of the process of passing .
Follow your instincts your lovely mum knows you are with are through this . They just know.
Sending you lots of love xxxx
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