It's all so shocking. When you hear of people battling for months sometimes years, at diagnosis you thi k there's time. At least to say all that you want. Nobody should suffer at all and everyone's loss is paramount. I just feel a bit cheated at how quickly things can happen. I'm sorry for your loss. 11 days is unimaginable. I have support its just talking to people who really understand is what I'm looking for I guess x

So sorry Brynsangel.  I lost mum mum 2 weeks ago on 11th September. She had Ovarian and fought for 2 and half years.  But she died suddenly from a heart attack/cardiac arrest. We were not prepared at all. She was still well enough to go for dinner a few nights before. We thought we had months left, maybe a year/

She had done her will but nothing else. She wanted to leave her grandchildren letters, and jewellery for their wedding days and she never got to do that. We never talked about the practical things like bank accounts and finances after she was gone.  My dad doesnt know where anything is and buried his head in the sand for 2 years.  I’m so angry and upset at the moment.  I should have listened better when she tried to talk about it, but I kept saying we weren’t there yet and there was time to worry about that later.  

There’s never a good time to die.  Always unfinished business... we were planning Christmas dinner the day before.  I walked into the lounge at mum and dads straight after she died and her ipad and the Morrisons catalogue were open on the sofa with all the lovely Christmas food circled

You're right there's never a good time. Dad had his heart attack first which then revealed the aggressive cancer. Strange how the body works. I do believe though for all of us and all of you that things don't happen for a reason. It's always been "things happen for a reason" I don't necessarily agree with that. But I do think "things don't happen for a reason". Such as wills and heartfelt goodbyes as I think sometimes there are no words, it's all feels. I was lucky enough to be with dad when he went last week, he hadn't made a will which I feel is for a reason. I got to say goodbye but not able to say quite what I wanted to. Even when I was told it would be a matter of hours I couldn't say what I wanted to but I know the "feeling" was there. I'm sorry I'm having verbal diarrhoea here. Just a lost lamb at the moment. Big hugs to you all xx

wow, what a unique way of looking at it. My mum always said things happen for a reason... which of course would mean the same for things that don’t happen.

Its funny you should say about saying goodbye.  I was absolutely dreading the end. I used to lie in bed crying at night worrying about how I would do it.  I just couldnt imagine it without a full blown panic attack.  Mum said she wasnt afraid of death, but was afraid of dying, the process.  Fading away inch by inch.  She went so quick, we none of us had to go through that.

I’m not especially religious, but they say god only sends you what you can deal with.  If he’s up there, he knew we weren’t strong enough to go through that.  For that I’m thankful.  We were saved the worst kind of pain imaginable.  I feel for the people who have been through that and had the strength to carry on.  They are heroes

L