Hello!

I hope you had a good day yesterday and today!

Keeping you updated as promised! :) 

Have been feeling a little bit better, yesterday I was in the gym most of the day, struggled to sleep again at night but I think I was just thinking/dwelling on things a little bit much. Today has been alright, been sorting some things for university. It’s hard being at home without Dad, but something to get used to I suppose :( .

But I have thought about what you’ve said, and re-read it a few times, and it certainly has been helping!

thank you xx

Morning Sweetie - had some things to do (boring) but back to normal today thanks for asking.

Glad you feel a bit better - that's how it will be up n down. Sleeping is hard sometimes. The early hours are difficult very often we are at our lowest physically & things seem a hundred times worse.

I was very touched that your boyfriend said for you to thank me for messaging. Sounds as tho' he cares for you & a good, thoughtful guy. I'm glad about that it's nice to have someone 'on your side'. :)

Are you going back to uni or just starting? I'm assuming as you're 21 that you are already there. I was a university lecturer & know that uni can be a double edged sword. Great for  company & keeping your mind on other things but also stressful in other ways. Hope, of course that it's the former for you & not the latter.

From all we've talked about in our posts I do genuinely think that you are managing well. That's not to say of course that I think for one moment that it's in any way easy for you, but that you are going thro' the grieving process in a healthy & very normal way.

You are clearly a very bright young man with a firm grasp of reality. (Don't mean to patronise you). Much of this, I suspect, must be down to your parents & your lovely dad. He'd be proud of how you are doing & you should be proud of yourself.

If you'd like to private message me you'd be very welcome. There will be difficult times ahead & if I can help in any way I'd be more than happy to try & to know how you're getting on.

In the meantime keep plodding thro' that sand & hang on to this enormous virtual hug I'm sending. xx

Hello! 

Yeah sleeping still seems to be an issue, it’s when I think the most and then it sort of spirals :( . 

Yeah he’s really lovely, absolutely as you’ve described him! But yes he’s said thank you for speaking to me because he can only offer so much help, and it’s nice to know there’s still some lovey people out there! :) 

I’m going into my final year of university, so the big dissertation and exams haha! I much prefer uni to being at home, just because I can be around my friends almost 24/7, but as you say, it’s equally as stressful sometimes! They have been helpful in offering support but obviously there’s only so much they can do. 

Im actually a young woman haha! But thank you very much ️ I really hope dad is proud of me, i’ll  keep trying to! I do worry about how i’ll Be back at uni with the stress of final year and still grieving about dad, but we’ll see how it pans out I suppose. I know things like Christmas will be hard in particular, and my birthday later this year.

not sure how you private message on this platform, but could be a good idea?

I hope you had a nice day!xx

Morning sweetie - can't think how I arrived at the conclusion you were a young man! I'll put it down to age :| what my husband used to call "a senior moment".

I know what you mean about boyfriend/friends only being able to do so much. For one thing they probably haven't been through it and secondly you probably don't want to spend your time with them talking about things that make you sad. That's the best thing I think, about talking to someone you don't know. Before I went to uni as a mature student I was a hairdresser & you'd be amazed at the things people tell their hairdressers! 

I wish I had some words of wisdom about sleeping better/stopping all those thoughts swirling about in your mind. I think it's one of those things that is part & parcel of the work (& it is work), of grieving. It will get better - probably when you get back to uni & you're busy & tired. Hope so.

You mention Christmas & your birthday - best not to think so far ahead if you can manage it. In my experience it's the things we dread most that turn out not to be so bad, but it's the things we don't anticipate that may suddenly be difficult. Life has a very funny way you know of carrying us along in unexpected (& not always horrid) ways.

Re: private messaging - I think you go to the top of the page & click on the 'speech cloud' there & ask to be a friend. That way I just get a message telling me there's one from you. 

Hope you have a good day today & you know where I am when you want a chat. Keep plodding sweetie & I promise you'll get to a much less painful place. x

Hello!

Im sorry it’s taken me a while to respond, my boyfriend came to visit me and then life just got in the way, but I promise I haven’t forgotten! 

I know what you mean, I tell my hairdresser way too much and I barely know her haha! But you’re right, it does help to get things off your chest to people you don’t know, as they don’t have any presumptions about your personality or such. 

Sleeping has been on and off, I slept a lot better when my boyfriend was around because I wasn’t alone, but still struggle with the thinking too much on my own. But as you say that’s just part and parcel with it I suppose. Like today was especially hard as it felt like I just kept having flashbacks to having Dad around all day, and I’ve missed him a lot this week :( . 

Yes I hope Christmas and Birthdays won’t be so bad, I just keep thinking about how much I would do/give to have him back for just an hour, but it just makes me cry every time :( 

I’ll try figure out the private chat in the morning! I hope you have had a lovely week thus far, and it’s not been too hot! And thank you again for being here to talk to xx