Hello Voda - that 'black bubble' as you describe it is probably much more common than you think but still a horrible place to be. It can be sometimes that when someone we love dies we get on with things like organising the funeral, getting back to work, juggling family life etc. etc. & proper grieving doesn't happen & it's important that it does otherwise it hasn't been dealt with properly. It seems to me that that's where you are just now.

Can I suggest that you make an appt with you GP because you might be depressed. If s/he thinks you are counselling might be offered or medication. I was clinically depressed mnay years ago & had both & it worked for me & has for many other people. Don't be embarrassed to ask for help (as you have done here). If you had a broken arm you would & really this is no different - just a different place in the body.

You say it is ruining your marriage & that's ver sad. Why not take the bull by the horns & ask your GP for help. 

I do hope that this has helped & that things start to get a little better for you.

Kind regards & a warm hug.