Hi Katie, reading what you have written could be like I had just wrote it. I feel completely the same as you. My dad died in October 2018 and I don’t think I’ll ever get over it. He was my most favourite person in the world and I am heartbroken. I am an only child and we have always been very close. Sometimes I think it’s been 5 months, should I be coping better than I am but then I think 5 months is nothing compared to the 45 years I have loved him for. I cry every day, a few times, anything can set me off. Sometimes I feel like it still hasn’t sunk in....I don’tknow where I think he’s gone....but I really struggle to believe I’m never going to see him again, it’s so final. No one can really understand what you are going through until they experience it for themselves. I have no help or advice to offer you, just support and to promise you you aren’t the only one feeling this way. Our daddy’s are our first love and our heroes. 

Take care, big hugs xxx

Hi there

Thank you all for your posts. I lost my dad to cancer on 26th December, 2020 and I cry every day.  I get through each day of work and looking after my beautiful girls  but I feel my heart is truly broken inside.

My dad was my best friend and my rock. He always looked after me and after 41 years still called me his little petal.  He made me laugh like nobody else and I adored him and I feel like I can never get over losing him.

I know people do say it gets easier with time and I hold onto that, but I just feel like I dont know how to live without him.

Michelle x

Hi Michelle,

This site makes you realise you are not alone and we are all feeling it.

I cannot believe my pal has gone ... just gone. I cannot comprehend it. I'm on 10 months now , the horror still hits and a get a panic , hot sweat , nausea , these have got less and some days I think I've got my head round it others not. I cry daily for what happened, the loss , the gap in my life. You start to live with it, I wanted a magic wand to take it all away and give me answers but I know that's not going to happen now and it's down to me to manage. I've to carry on without him. That's the really hard bit as I don't want to. 
you think your the only one , you are not xxxx 
 

I can still see and hear my dad in hospital.  They said he was unresponsive.  But I would say I love you dad and he would say 'I know Pet'.  So I know they were wrong and he was there for me as always.

It takes time, a lot of time but good memories do start to overtake the trauma.  I'm at 2.5 years on and still have my bad days and always will I expect.   Still marking every little anniversary and going through the photos because he was such a lovely dad.  xxxx

Jube, hang in there like I did and am still doing.   You sound a caring person and that's why you feel it so much.  My brother misses my dad too,  but not like me so I can't talk to him easily as he thinks I should have moved on by now.  I'm sure he loves him as much as I do but some of us just take  it  much harder.  Others don't always get it but those of  us  here do xxx

Jube, hang in there like I did and am still doing.   You sound a caring person and that's why you feel it so much.  My brother misses my dad too,  but not like me so I can't talk to him easily as he thinks I should have moved on by now.  I'm sure he loves him as much as I do but some of us just take  it  much harder.  Others don't always get it but those of  us  here do xxx

You are pretty much right there. I blamed myself for decisions put on me during first lockdown , I kept him home I shouted for meds , the responsibility was too much in my mind , small steps. We are appear to be feeling it similarly though xxxxxx