I no how your feeling I lost my mum in August 2018 to sclc they started chemo but unfortunately it spread to her brain she was only 60yrs old and like you I'm deverstated.

I am sorry to hear this. I lost my mother on January 17th 2016 and it still feels like it was today with the same feelings of disbelief and pain.

Hi Tania,

It sounds like you’ve all had a massive shock. The only thing you can take from this is that she didn’t have to suffer for long. She didn’t have to go through the gruesome cancer treatments like chemotherapy which has awful side effects and all the *** stuff that comes with living with cancer... 

I just want you to know that greieving is a natural process and you’re absolutely bound to feel like utter crap after such a tragic thing. Remember to keep busy, say yes to doing things and eventually your horrible memories of your mums last moments will be overturned with the more happy ones from her life. 

As for nobody understanding, they probably won’t unless they’ve been in the situation themselves. But they’re the ones who are going to get you through this, without them even knowing it.

Keep going. L x 

Hi Tania,

I identify so much with you, I lost my Husband 6 weeks ago and we didn't even know that he had cancer until a week before he died. He was 59. I have replayed the final week so much I feel like I'm stuck in a loop with it. You've had a massive shock, don't underestimate what that has done to you. Is there anyone outside the family that you can talk to ? a GP or a good friend that you can let your emotions free with ?  The feeling of being alone I think is normal (I have it) and I can't believe that anyone really knows how I feel. I am getting there and you will too - it's so hard but  try and remember some good times and realise that it will take time to accept the shock and loss.

My thoughts are with you x

I’m so sorry to hear about your mum, and at such a young age too :( it’s just so hard to get your head around, isn’t it? Losing a parent is hard xx

I’m so sorry :( I’ve spoken to a lot of people like yourself now that’ve said the same :( xx

Thanks for your words xx A lot of people have said the same now but as my dad said a couple of days ago, we just didn’t get a chance to say goodbye as by the time she’d gone to hospital, she was in a state of delirium and couldn’t speak. My uncle currently has cancer and sadly nothing can be done to help. I see his family watching him fade away and think in some ways, that would’ve been worse. I don’t know... It’s hard. No one wants to lose a loved one, however it happens but as you say, at least mum didn’t have multiple hospital trips or have to endure chemo etc xxx