Hi Millie, 

I’m 16 too, I lost my mum 9 years ago when I was 7. Sometimes it is hard to cope when I am reminded of her, most of the time it slips my mind and I can be happy. I hope you find some happiness 

Hi Marcy11, 

Good to hear from someone in a similar sitution thank you for sharing that with me. I always try to think of the happy memories but it just seems so hard at the moment. 

Have a nice week :)

I understand. Try to remember that in the not too distant future you’ll make plenty more happy memories with other people. 

Hope you feel better I know how impossible it feels right now, it takes some time 

Hi Millie,

I completely understand how you feel, I lost my Mum 8 months ago and I have never lost anyone else before that. I still don’t believe she’s gone, It’s something that I don’t think I honestly will get used to. I’m 26 and none of my friends have lost their mum either so they cant relate to how I feel or even begin to imagine losing their mum. The only advice I can give is be strong. Take each day as it comes , somedays u may feel ok and some days will be a real struggle. Do what you feel u should do and cry whenever you want to cry, there is no right or wrong way to grieve and it takes time. There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t think and miss my mum, but I have to remember she isn’t in pain anymore and I know she’s with me in spirit. 

I just wanted to let you know that your not alone and take each day as it comes. 

Take care

Hi Becca, 

Thank you so much for your reply. It helped me so much, I have not lost any one else before either so it is good to hear from someone in a similar position. I agree, I will never ever get used to this loss either :(. 

Take care too, Millie x 

Hi Millie,I feel so sad for you,what an awful thing to happen to you.Have you had a chat with your GP and let him/her know how you are feeling which is a natrual process of losing someone.Its too much to even comprehend that it has happened.It causes anxiety ,fear ,every emotion our body has.Your GP will be able to guide you a little maybe referring you to a counciling group with people your age who will all be struggling and you will realise your not alone.You May be able to meet a friend who you can support and she can support you with your feelings .I really think it’s important to make an appointment and get a little help and direction.God Bless you,please come back on and let us know how your doing we are always here to chat,listen and support you.xxxxxx

Hi Millie, 

first of all I am so so sorry to hear about your mum, I lost my mum to cancer when I was 19 my great nanan at 18 and my nanan on the 14th of October this year. I’m now 22. I totally understand as your friends will be there for you but will never understand, the raw feeling is so difficult and awful but please when I tell you this it gets better, well not better but more bareable, you need to keep your mums memory alive, I have found that doing a memory box, I have so many photos and sentimental things such as writing memories and putting them in a box to read on them bad days. Never feel alone, always talk, never feel afraid or embarrassed to talk to anyone about how you feel. I still find it too hard to this day, I feel so empty and sometimes never know how I feel, I just hope you find some happiness..

I know you will probably not get comfort from comments such as “your mum would want this” because I didn’t, you will have mixed emotions but time is a healer you learn to grow as a person be such a strong person, one day you will look back and not only keep your mums memory alive but be proud of how far you’ve come, it’s not easy but take each day as it comes and never rush in to anything take your time. To deal with this at such a young age is heart breaking but never feel alone & do her proud 

Emily x

Hello Betbunhugo, 

I have had a chat with my GP yes around a week ago. I was told I would not be able to have counselling yet as it is too soon since her passing. I am struggling so much, especially as it is coming up to Christmas it is making it so much harder. She loved Christmas and we would celebrate together every year and it would be such a happy time, and now it all seems pointless as she is not here anymore. 

I have so much going on in my life unrelated to this, and with everything on top of this, I feel like I am literally drowning in sadness :/ I really have no idea how I am going to carry on.

Thanks for your reply x Millie

Hi Emily, 

Thanks for your reply it means alot. I am so sorry about all of your losses. 

I have made a photo album of her photos and have a memory book which I do look at when I feel sad, which is pretty much all the time. 

It is so difficult in the run up to christmas, the first christmas without her is going to be very tough. Did you find this too? You sound like you have really grown as a person from your experiences and I hope I can find some happiness and do the same. 

Take care, 

Millie x 

Oh Millie ,I feel like I want to give you a big cuddle.Could you go back to your GP and see if he can give you a little medication just to calm your anxiety not anything addictive,your doctor would know what to give you.It wouldn’t mask it as you have to grieve but I think a little help would be good for you.Everything seems pointless at a time like this,you can’t see past the darkness.Please make a phone call to the Samaritans or a help group as they are so kind and experienced with this and it’s a lovely voice on the end of the phone listening and a contact you can talk to in privacy on how you are feeling.Christmas is the toughest time of the year when you lose someone .You also say you feel like your drowning with other things that are going on in your life.Please phone The Samaritans or the NHS have a help group it’s not Counselling it’s someone that you can talk to off load everything that is upsetting you on top of your massive loss in your life.Im routing for you.Make a call,have a chat,if you can deal with the other stuff that’s overwhelming you,you have enough to deal with.Try and do that today and call the doctor again and if they aren’t sympathetic you can ask to see another doctor.

your in my thoughts ,hope to hear back from you saying that you’ve got some help,you do need some.

can I ask do you have family living with you,or close by?

lots of love Karenxxxxxx