Cancer Research UK main site
  • Replies 3 replies
  • Views 239 views
  • Users 0 members are here

Cancer experience

Elle.24
Offline

Hi everyone,

I'm new to this forum and joined as I thought it would be helpful to talk to others about my experience of coping with or losing a loved one with cancer.

My grandad was diagnosed with terminal stage 4 lung cancer in July 2016. He had several treatments including radiotherapy, chemotherapy and the gamma knife treatment. He fought really well for so long. 

In August of this year, he was admitted to hospital with severe chest pains, and was diagnosed with community acquired pneumonia. The day before this, he had a lung biopsy. I'm not a doctor, but I believe if it wasn't for this biopsy, he wouldn't have developed pneumonia, as it is caused by bacteria entering the lungs, which was quite possibly due to the biopsy he had. 

A week after being admitted, he passed away peacefully in hospital. I am the youngest of his 5 grandchildren, and I shared almost every experience and treatment session with him, and sat by his side as he died. 

During the last week of his life which he spent in hospital, I had so many questions I wanted to ask, to people who knew what it felt like, which if I had known then, it would have put me more at ease. So as I experienced this with my grandad, I'd be happy to answer anyone else's questions, and offer support to anyone in similar situations to me. 

Thank you, I look forward to any responses.

Elle. Xxx

  • Offline

    Hi elle

    Welcome to the forum although I'm sorry for your loss and the circumstances that have brought you here.

    It sounds like you were a great support to your grandfather and he sounds like such a fighter.

    My Dad was very recently diagnosed with Lung Cancer and I'm struggling at the moment and think it's so wonderful that you have come on here to help others. I find it so useful to read others experiences as with this you just don't know what to expect do you?

    It's funny you should say about the pneumonia being linked to biopsy as my Dad was admitted into hospital a few days after his too with pneumonia. He is still in there now over 2 weeks later and is having another biopsy this afternoon.

    I never linked the two!

    I'm sending you and your family lots of warm wishes at this hard time. x

  • Offline in reply to Helen85

    Hi Helen,

    Thank you so much for your response and supportive words. And sorry for my late response I've been busy at school :)

    How did your dad's biopsy go? Is he recovering well?

    I'd never made links between pneumonia and biopsies either, until I read that a severe and fairly rare side effect of a biopsy is coming down with pneumonia. Hopefully your dad's case isn't too severe and he will keep fighting, and I am sending you and your family all the best and lots of love.

    I look forward to hearing from you again. xx

  • Offline

    I feel your pain . My mum was dynoised with terminal cancer out of the blue . A small lump in neck and 7 months later gone !! I nursed her at my home till the end . She wrote letters to us all .. I sat with her while she planned her funeral.. and we both couldn't see or speak through our tears .  We had the most horrendous , painful conversations which actually took my breathe away .  She was only bedridden and ill 10 days before She died so I never believed it . It was like she had gone out one day shopping and never returned .. a complete shock !!    I will never get over it . The pain is unbearable .  I lost my hair .. have nightmares .. think something bad is going to happen everyday .. scared of life .. cry at everything .. can never go into places we visited together ...  I question life everyday .   Why are we here ?? My thoughts are so irrational.  I'm so scared of dying .. scared of planning even the next day in case I never wake up .  She died on 30th July 2016 and nothing gets better.   When she was in the funeral parlour..I sat with her every day and begged them to keep her there so i could just see her .  I can talk about her but cannot think about her .  I'm physically sick and can't breath if I do .    I tried counselling but it never worked for me .   I'm sick of people saying you have your memories ... I don't want memories I want my mum !!!!!!  I'm even question whether she was real as it all seems surreal . My life is broken . I'm never happy ... nothing excites me anymore .  My poor dad is an absolute car crash ..  every time I see him we break down and collapse  in each others arms .   His health is deteriorating and I can't help him as I'm frightened he's going to die in front of my eyes and I don't want to be anywhere near when this happens as I think I would die too !!!I have a fab family but nobody can feel my pain and help me understand what has happened .    The more you love ... the more it hurts .  Life sucks

Speak to a nurse

Quick links

Follow us

Registered with Fundraising Regulator (logo)
Cancer Research UK is a registered charity in England and Wales (1089464), Scotland (SC041666), the Isle of Man (1103) and Jersey (247). A company limited by guarantee. Registered company in England and Wales (4325234) and the Isle of Man (5713F). Registered address: 2 Redman Place, London, E20 1JQ.