Hi Nicola so sorry to read about the loss of your mum to cancer. Did she pass away suddenly or was she ill for a long time if you don't mind me asking? My mum died April this year from colon cancer she was only ill for a few months and the end came pretty quickly. I too have children a little older than your 17 and 12 but they were and are devastated. My mum looked after them when they were younger and they used to sleep at her house. We find talking about the good times helps and remembering all the funny stuff she used to do. I also like yourself have my dad to look after. He's 74 but still young at heart and healthy and he's misses her companionship, evenings are the worst for him. I'm struggling to get him to keep going. It's so hard isn't it and such a cruel disease. I have no answers on how to help your son Thomas just lots of love and trying to keep him busy although surely school must be able to with counselling etc. My son who's 12 had a really bad spell of bad behaviour when my mum passed and they were Able to sort this out at school with input from me. 

Kirsty xx