Hi there sunny ...

So sorry you lost your mum ... there's no easy way through ... l think the first year is like raw pain ... and like a cut it takes time to heal ... those feelings are normal, it's all part of the grieving process ... it's the price we pay for having wonderfull parents ... 

What l do if the memories are too painfull is to think of the happiest memory of mum ... and I relive it slowly in my mind... word for word, how it made you feel ... and play it over and over till it takes away the painfull memory ... 

But remember, she's not gone, she just lives tucked up in your heart... no one can take that away .. and she is in you, she made you .. so you'll always be a part of her ... I still look up at night and tell my mum the family news ... I just picture her around me, and I try to live like she'd want me too ... to make her proud ... so sending you a vertual hug ... Chrissie x