My dad passed 8 weeks ago and I still can’t get my head around it. He had bowel cancer 6 years ago. He went into hospital for an operation to remove it however he had complications and ended up staying in for weeks on end. Finally he was in the clear however was told that he couldn’t reverse the colonoscopy bag he had been given. He had always been an unwell man, over weight, diabetes, glaucoma, high blood pressure and back problems. He was in the clear for a couple years and then his cancer came back, in his liver. He had heart failure and stents put in earlier in the year. The doctors struggled to eradicate it in his liver, he kept losing a lot of blood and when he accidentally bumped his head, the cancer spread there too. He kept losing a lot of blood and had to go into hospital for blood transfusions and then he’d come out and recover again. His last operation was for a fractured hip, which meant he couldn’t walk towards the end. He really went through the wars and deteriorated during the course of a year but we all thought he’d get better and that he had so much longer with us. When be told us tbat the doctor told him he didn’t nhave long, again none of us didn’t fully believe it, none of us thought it was his time. This whole process has been incredibly hard, I didn’t think this level of sadness was possible. What makes things worse is his wife hasn’t wanted anything to do with his children from his previous marriage. We’ve had to see dad in secret this past couple years to save him any hassle at home, to keep her happy so that she still care do for him (he’d tell us of times when she wouldn’t help to hange his bag for him because she was in a mood). She wouldn’t let us see him before Christmas and he was anxious on the telephone to us, apologizing that’s he couldn’t let us come to see him whilst she was home (and she kept cancelling work). It’s sad that she didn’t tell us how bad he’d got and we didn’t have a chance to say our goodbyes. Since dad’s passed, she’s barely contacted us, we found out through a relative. We still don’t know how he passed and she’s won’t let us see our little half siblings who must be devastated. I’m so worried about them. Surprisingly I’m not angry with her, just surprised at her actions and incredibly sad. Even having been to the funeral, I still can’t believe it’s real. I just want him back :,(
