Hi there Bears ... so sorry you lost your dad to this horrible cancer...  I lost both my mum and dad before l was 40 ... so my heart goes out to you ... but l hope like me , you were blessed to have wonderfull memories ... try and remember the good ones, and not the recent ones ... 

So sending you a big hug ... Chrissie xx 

Hello Bears.  I also wanted to say how sorry I am that your Dad died and that he had to suffer such pain.  It is an awful feeling when you have lost a parent; not only do you no longer have them but while still suffering badly you have to deal with the nuts and bolts of their lives.

I an guessing from your post that you have no siblings but I hope you have other family who will support you and friends who will do the same.  You may not believe it now but eventually you will get used to it and as Chrissie says still have your fond memories.

So sorry to hear your sad news my dad passed away on 25th Jan 2019 and I have never felt pain like it my heart goes out to you... I cannot believe he is gone .. Its a horrendous feeling .. Take good care of yourself xx