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Missing my mum

Megf123
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Hi guys, 

My mum passed away from stage 4 cancer, Decemeber 13th 2016, just aged 40. Im 17 and have two brothers. I have been living at my nans for a couple of years now as mum was on chemo and was very poorly that she could no longer take care of us. However, I do not get along with my nan, we argue almost every day and it gets to the stage where I have ran out the house before. I feel as if I have no one to talk to and i feel even more lonely when I am having a 'miss you day'. I still haven't come to terms with my mums loss as I am still grieving. I was wondering if there is anything that could possibly help to cheer me up.

Many thanks

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    Sorry tried to send reply but can’t see it at my end!

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    Oh hunny ... life sure isn’t fare ... I wish sometimes I had a magic wand to help you ... I thought I was young when I lost my mum , I was35 and I felt cheated too ... have you been offered counselling? I think every young person should get that ... it’s such a shame , not getting on with your nan but she’s probably missing her too and it’s a shame it doesn’t bring you closer ... if your mans getting on in years she might find things difficult to cope with ... could you try talking to her when things are calm and saying it’s braking your heart not getting on , and maybe she will open up too ...

    have you got any other family you can talk to ... although it’s painful, the more you can open up, it does help ... please hold on in there ... you have your life ahead of you and try to take one day at a time ... if you want to get it all off your chest , this is the right place ... there’s always someone here who will listen and help you through ... there’s a free phone help line on here and McMillan too ... they will listen to you .. and may know how you can get counselling...

    keep thinking one day you will have your own family , and you can tell them all about your wonderfull mum ... I’m sure she’s looking over you from up there and telling you to keep going and I bet she’s so proud of you... sending you a humongous hug ... Chrisie xx

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    Just wanted to say what a beautiful photo .... ️ Xx

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    Oh god l am so sorry you are all so young. I lost my mum on 10th aug and its the hardest thing l have been through and l am 44. 

    My thoughts are with you

    L x

  • Offline in reply to Lors23

    Hello, 

    So sorry to hear about your mum, I agree it is the hardest thing to go through even though I am only 17 I am always here for a chat! 

    My thoughts are with you xx

  • in reply to Megf123

    Welcome to the forum Meg although I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your mum and the reason you find yourself here.

    I noticed you said you were 17 so I just wanted to let you know that there is a website dedicated to helping teenagers cope with a parent that has or had cancer which is called riprap. They have a lot of helpful information and advice as well as a forum just like ours if you feel like chatting to others of a similar age about what you are going through.

    I hope this helps and remember that we are always here whenever you need us.

    Kind regards, 

    Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator

  • Offline in reply to Chriss
    Hi Chrisie, I did reply back a couple of hours ago but i dont think it sent. I was offered counselling in school as grandad passed away in 2013, however I went in the room with the lady and I did not say a word.. I never went back after that. I have been offered counselling again due to mum passing away but I dont like it I feel very uncomfortable telling somebody ive never bet before how I feel, its more the fact that I feel embarrassed. Everyone argues with my nan, shes 61 so she isnt that old, but we argue on a daily basis. I have a younger brother aged 15 but he is very quiet and I have an older brother aged 20 who I am close to but I will not speak to either of them about mum as I feel embarrassed and I know everyone else in my family is suffering from her loss too not just me, so i tend to keep my feelings to myself unless someone at home sees me crying. It makes it worse when im having a 'miss you day' when i argue with nan as mum used to text me and ring me constantly when she was in hospital. I can still picture myself going into my mums hospital room when the nurse announced she had gone and I still dream about her too , waking up in the morning thinking that shes still here. Mum had a tough life, it breaks my heart knowing she went through so much pain with the chemo and the cancer spreading but she was always so cheerful even though i knew deep down she was hurting. I will continue to make mum proud as she made me proud through fighting for years on end. Thankyou so much Chrisie for your lovely words, you have really helped me xxx
  • Offline in reply to Moderator Steph

    Hi Steph,

    I will definately try the website you have recommended as i feel that will help me to talk to other people that are experiencing or have experienced the same as what I have. 

    Many thanks xx

  • Offline in reply to barbdoglover

    Hi, dont worry I am having a bit of trouble with my replies too , i type a message and press the reply button but it doesnt send in which i have to type the whole of my message out again !! x

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