Hi there. I'm so sorry for your loss and diagnosis. We lost my eldest brother last year to this terrible disease. My mum and brother shared the same birthday and the were 60 years and 90 years old in 2016. 24 days afterwards he passed away. I do understand your grief, Mum was devestated and the images of those last few weeks are and remain harrowing. Your son would want you to focus on your own health now . To survive and enjoy the life that he was denied. My brother was constantly reminding my mother of the fortune of her good health and the need to make the most of what we have . With your own treatment do not be afraid to challenge your oncologist if you are not happy . Ask questions pin them down on monitoring how the drugs are working and insist on regular scans . Kidney cancer is a silent one as we have two kidneys and one can do the job . There are several drugs available to treat, so ask why they have chosen that particular drug for you , understand your treatment options. Please talk to your daughters and tell them everything. They can and will support you. Focusing on getting you better will help your girls manage their own grief , give them a focus. It's not about forgetting your son it's about getting you Better which is what he would want. Together you are stronger . You can do this, I know this is hard. Focusing on my mums health after my brothers death, seeing her through to where she is now has helped me cope but I have not forgotten about my brothers loss not for one minute. But I am doing what I know he would want me to do and that gives me comfort. Keep posting with your progress. We will be thinking of you

Hi there. I'm so sorry for your loss and diagnosis. We lost my eldest brother last year to this terrible disease. My mum and brother shared the same birthday and the were 60 years and 90 years old in 2016. 24 days afterwards he passed away. I do understand your grief, Mum was devestated and the images of those last few weeks are and remain harrowing. Your son would want you to focus on your own health now . To survive and enjoy the life that he was denied. My brother was constantly reminding my mother of the fortune of her good health and the need to make the most of what we have . With your own treatment do not be afraid to challenge your oncologist if you are not happy . Ask questions pin them down on monitoring how the drugs are working and insist on regular scans . Kidney cancer is a silent one as we have two kidneys and one can do the job . There are several drugs available to treat, so ask why they have chosen that particular drug for you , understand your treatment options. Please talk to your daughters and tell them everything. They can and will support you. Focusing on getting you better will help your girls manage their own grief , give them a focus. It's not about forgetting your son it's about getting you Better which is what he would want. Together you are stronger . You can do this, I know this is hard. Focusing on my mums health after my brothers death, seeing her through to where she is now has helped me cope but I have not forgotten about my brothers loss not for one minute. But I am doing what I know he would want me to do and that gives me comfort. Keep posting with your progress. We will be thinking of you