I know how you feel at this minute. I lost my wife April 6 after a very short diagnosis period. We had 3 weeks from.finding out to her passing. The run up to the funeral is hard. After that I found the loneliness the hardest and most difficult. There is not a single day goes by that I don't cry or feel the world has ended. It is really hard to try and fit back into the real world. I have found that people on here help and really do offer support. As I have found out it takes time and every day is a new challenge. I hope that you find peace and happinesssoon.
My Partner passed away two months ago on Friday, on the 5th March.
After completing all the legal stuff - which is a distraction in some respects and keeps one busy, suddenly it all ends and one is left in a sort of nowhere land. In my case I have found it very difficult because I have not really been able to accept what has happened. Even now I sort of half expect that I will stop living a most awful dream and life will return to normal. But I don't and it doesn't. Some days are better than others. Bad days are awful. What should be good memories just make matters worse, because they highlight what I have lost. I feel guilty because although I did everything I could to protect my soulmate, I just feel that I failed. Hopefully, things will improve and my memories will be a treasure, but right now it doesn't seem to be happening.
Tears, and there are lots of them, flow every day, and they flow without warning.
On entering the house, I used to call out "It's only me, I am back!", and I still do it. But I don't get the answer I always used to get.
I just can't get my mind to accept the fact that I can't turn the clock back - that the most awful thing has happened and there is nothing I can do about it.
People have said to me that I need to "snap out of it" because it is not doing me any good, and I know they mean well, but I find that my reaction is to withdraw further into my own world.
I completely understand you. I fully get where you are coming from and it is so hard to try and be normal. Others have things going on and for us the world has stopped turning. I expect my phone to ring or a text message and get nothing. I am at my lowest right now and reached out for support from a bereavement centre. This is too much for me to deal with and like you struggle to even do the most basic tasks. Have you tried contacting anybody?. I have family and friends and they help but don't really appreciate how deep this lose has hit. In my mind I wish I was a day away from joining my wife again. I can only say me too I am hurting and everything is raw. You or me cannot wind back the clock. We can chat when times are really bas if required.Hurt is an understatement but you are 100% not alone.
i am sorry to hear of the passing of your loved ones.
I am 8 months since my dear father passed and what I have experienced in my grieve is that there I know there is no time limit or set plan on how to face this, it really is a day by day situation, one day I was upset and the next I would feel at peace, no one has the right to tell you " snap out of it" how dare they, family, associates , colleagues should be with you during this stage in your life and supporting you.
I felt guilty when my father passed , because I was still living and he was not, I spent so much time taking him to treatment and cooking healthy food to try and make this horrible dieases go away.
When I visit my mum , I open the door and expect to see my dad in his chair, but you know what, my mind senses he there and I just whisper "hey dad"
anyway , please don't be hard on yourself , there is no time limit just take a day at a time because that is all you can do, my mum joined slimming world to lose a little weight but also to get out and meet new people and she now enjoys cooking different meals .
