Cancer Research UK main site

Coping with mums death

Milliyn
Offline

Not sure why I'm posting this or how I think it will help me. I'm 36 and my mum passed away from secondary breast cancer just over 2 years ago. I'm still finding each day really hard. My feelings go from incredible sadness to anger! She was the most incredible woman and loved her grandchildren so much. She loved every second she had with them. I've had another child since her death and it makes me so sad to think that's she's missing out on her life. I know how much she would have loved her and it breaks my heart that she's not here to meet her.

I have days where I'm ok but I also have days like today where I struggle to function. I find it all so cruel. She had so much to live for.  

Sending all my love to anyone who has lost someone to  this horrible disease xxx

  • Offline

    Hiya.  I also lost my mum to cancer and know how hard it is but please remember your mum wouldn't can't you to be sad.  She sounds like a lady who would can't you to celebrate her life and tell your kids how amazing she was.  She will always be looking down on you and your family and will never miss a moment of what is going on.  I have lost both my parents but I have a photograph of the whole family wholesale were on holiday and I look at it every day 1 to remember them but also 2 to see who I see first as I know that's them looking down on me.  On my bad days I would put my grief into a little box at the back of my mind and refuse to let it rule me.  I would then let it out a wee bit at a time to deal with it when I felt strong enough.  I hope this helps you xx

  • Offline
    Hi, I saw your post and had to reply - I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. I lost my mum in December 2016, I'm a similar age to you. Our mums sound so similar, my mum adored her grandchildren and I think it broke her heart when she realised she wouldn't see them grow up. I was lucky in that she met both my sons, but I feel so sad when I think that they won't remember her as they are too young. My mum also died of secondary breast cancer, we had a wonderful year when we thought it had gone, but then found out it had come back and was in her brain. They said that she had a prognosis of 18 months, but in fact she died within 3 and a half months. It does help to know that there are other people out there who are going through this as well. I hope you are having a better day today xxx

Speak to a nurse

Quick links

Follow us

Registered with Fundraising Regulator (logo)
Cancer Research UK is a registered charity in England and Wales (1089464), Scotland (SC041666), the Isle of Man (1103) and Jersey (247). A company limited by guarantee. Registered company in England and Wales (4325234) and the Isle of Man (5713F). Registered address: 2 Redman Place, London, E20 1JQ.