Dad

my dad died a month ago today. We were not on the best terms for a few years now and I wasn't aware of how bad the cancer was until two days before he passed. I had visited him a few times, he looked sick but still not terrible. The last two days of his life took every muscle he had from him all at once. When I arrived at the hospital he could not talk, or move. I just talked to him the day before on the phone and he had a full conversation with me. I held his hand. And sat with my dad as he took his last breaths. I have never felt this much pain. I think of him every day. I have dreams that we are still in the hospital and I'm holding his hand. I feel like I jut keep reliving it. I don't know how people get through this. I try to be strong but I don't think I am that strong. Any advice would be appreciated I don't have anyone who has been through anything like this, and I feel so lost. 

  • Welcome to the forum kennedya although I'm really sorry for the reason it has brought you here and on behalf of the cancer chat team I just wanted to offer you our condolences on the passing of your dad last month.

    Even though you may not have been on the best of terms for a few years I'm glad you went to see your dad at the hospital and were able to be with him at the end. He may not have been able to talk but I'm sure he really appreciated you being there holding his hand and that little gesture would have given him so much comfort and strength in the time he had left.

    Coping with grief and loss can be very tough as so many of our members know and I'm sure they will post soon to offer their advice and support you through this difficult time. I have also found some information on our website that may help you at this time as well.

    Kind Regards,

    Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator