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I lost both my parents

Bobtail83
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Hi

I lost my mum back in August to Pancreatic cancer. She was diagnosed in July and just a month later she passed away. She had chemo and unfortuntely was not strong enough for it and passed away a few days later. 

I also lot my dad 11 years ago to mouth cancer.

My mum has always been my rock in so many ways and I am finding it very hard to deal with the greiving this time. How do you cope after something like this? I can't come to terms with life without her and have no one that I can confide to, that actually understands what I am going through.

I am also worried for myself as we have a strong history of cancer in my family. I have a prolactinoma (non cancerous tumour) I am worried there could be a possibility for this to become cancerous? I am seeing the genetics specialist through the doctors, I don't know if there are any other preventative measures I can take?

The worst part of loosing my mother was seeing what she went through at the end and all she was worried about was everybody else! Her partner was very difficult in this time and I think made things more stressful for her (but that's another topic) I feel so bad for her last suffering weeks

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    Hi there Bobtail, welcome to the forum, but so sorry to hear about the loss of your Mom from this terrible disease. I understand why you would be concerned about getting cancer yourself since both of your parents died with it. It does sound though, like you are being diligent in getting anything out of the ordinary checked out by your doctors and the fact that they are aware of your family history will hopefully prevent anything getting out of hand. I'm not a medical person but I think you are doing all that you can to prevent cancer, if it does show up, from getting very far before its' caught. Other than that, staying as healthy as you can is likely all you can do. You don't say if you have siblings around, and if so, how is their health? I also hope you have some family and friends around now for emotional support. Coming to this forum was a wise move on your part. People on here are very caring and supportive so stay in touch and let us know how you are.

    Take care.

    Lorraine

  • Offline in reply to LorraineD

    Hi

    Thanks for your reply. I have a sister but we have not got along in a long time. I did try to be supportive as much as possible around the time of my mums death and funeral but did it was not reciprocated in my favour (not that I give support to only receive it but things have always been this way with my sister unfortunately...which is another topic but she seemed to be purposly difficult a number of times towards me over this hard time). I think her health is okay although she always has drank a lot.

    I have my boyfried for some sort of support and have been in touch with one of my mothers life long friends, somebody who I did not know prior to the funeral but has been supportive through some of the issues faced (regarding my mums partner) and the aftermath etc 

    Other than this I have some friends but they all live far away so it's mainly online support from them which just doesn't feel the same.

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