Struggling..

husband's bowel cancer has recurred, rubbish prognosis. Have to admit to be struggling with the reality of what our future holds, I don't want to become a resentful old woman but that's where I'm heading...

  • I'm so sorry, i feel for you. I am currently struggling with my mum's advanced metastatic bowel cancer, and my biggest issue is the fear and uncertainty about the future, not about the end point as such, but about the path that leads there. I hope that you and your husband get all the support you can xx
  • Thank you so much for posting, you're right about it being the path that is the biggest fear, there is no easy answer.  Many thoughts of care and support to  you and your mum xx 

  • Are you both getting some Macmillan support? My mum is benefitting from the counselling they've referred her to, and i'm probably going to get some too. I don't know what i'd say to a counsellor, but i had a good cry to one of the staff at our Maggie's centre a few weeks ago and felt so much better for a while just after having offloaded, even though they can't provide any solutions. My mum is enjoying going into the hospice once a week too, for drop in support and activities. It all seems pointless given that no one can change what's going to happen, but it does seem to make a difference to the way you feel, i would recommend accessing all the support services that are available. Also i'm trying to practice a bit of this mindfulness thing, to try to quieten all the awful negative thoughts that buzz around your head in the middle of the night, i think it would be helpful if i actually did it a bit more regularly. I hope you find whatever works for you to get you through each day xx