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Numb

melle_mel
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I lost my lovely mum last Sunday to bowel cancer. I am utterly heartbroken. But at the same time I feel numb, to everything. It's like I can't really believe it has happened at all. The first few days I couldn't function at all, I was a mess. But over the last couple of days I feel like although I am really missing her I just can't seem to get what has happened into my head. I've read that it is the denial phase of grief but it feels really disconcerting and I wondered if anyone else has had similar feelings and how they dealt with them? Is this normal? And how long should this feeling last? I feel so detached. 

 

Thank you.

Melanie. 

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    Hi Melanie, am so sorry to hear about your loss. I totally understand how you feel. I lost my mam 2 weeks ago to breast cancer which had spread to the brain. I had to arrange everything whilst sorting out financial matters as my dad who is 80 & also terminal with cancer was unable to. I had also taken time off work to care for mam but in the end I only looked after for 2,weeks before she died. It's only now I'm starting to process things. I keep thinking of things to tell her then remember I can't. I've actually started writing these down in a book to help me. It's a very strange  feeling though. I think I completely shut down when it happened. I keep going over everything that's gone on & am finding that unless I'm with people I can't leave the house. 

    I don't know how long it will last but thought I would let you know there is someone else feeling the same. It's a truly awful thing to go through. I miss mam so much. I'm not ready to go back to work yet either & will probably take another few weeks off. Am hoping in that timeframe things will start feeling easier to deal with.

    Big hugs 

    Jillx

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    Hi Melanie, am so sorry to hear about your loss. I totally understand how you feel. I lost my mam 2 weeks ago to breast cancer which had spread to the brain. I had to arrange everything whilst sorting out financial matters as my dad who is 80 & also terminal with cancer was unable to. I had also taken time off work to care for mam but in the end I only looked after for 2,weeks before she died. It's only now I'm starting to process things. I keep thinking of things to tell her then remember I can't. I've actually started writing these down in a book to help me. It's a very strange  feeling though. I think I completely shut down when it happened. I keep going over everything that's gone on & am finding that unless I'm with people I can't leave the house. 

    I don't know how long it will last but thought I would let you know there is someone else feeling the same. It's a truly awful thing to go through. I miss mam so much. I'm not ready to go back to work yet either & will probably take another few weeks off. Am hoping in that timeframe things will start feeling easier to deal with.

    Big hugs 

    Jillx

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