Hi I lost my mam a week today. I can't believe how painful the grief is. She had breast cancer four years,ago & bravely fought it. But last July it had returned & 6 weeks,ago it spread to her brain. Myself & my dad nursed her at home but as,dad also has terminal cancer & it was getting too much we put mam in hospice for a few days. That was on the Friday & she died the following Monday. She said she wanted to go & could fight it no longer, she was incredibly brave. I was with her when she died. She talked right up to the end but also to someone not seen - I like to think it was my Gran.
She was my best friend & confidant - I could tell her anything, we talked every day! The pain is horrendous but there is much to sort, funeral & finances that you don't have time to think. My dad has cancer in his stomach, oesphagys & liver & in the last week has become a shadow of his former self. I'm worried I am going to go through this all again soon with dad. He has,a scan next week & will take it from there. I have a brother who has been a difficult presence in our lives so it's an added difficulty. We think he has aspergers or something similar so is no support.
I'm finding everything so very difficult and the one person I would go to for advice is mam. My husband has been a tower of strength but I feel as if I will never feel happiness again. I would welcome people's experiences navigating through the painful process of grieving.
Thank you
Jill