Syliva, I am so very sorry for your loss, I know how it feels, my husband passed away in October and I miss him so much, I too wish they could let us know they are ok.  There are lots of people on here going through the same terrible time who will offer support.  Sending love to you Debbie xxxxxx

Hi debbie, how are you havnt heard off you in a while i feel ok at the moment health wise ,got to go the hospital next month  to see about my breathing me and the kids just having a quite xmas dinner we will go to the crem  to put flowers on my parents grave ,we will put some flowers in a vase for my hubby ,it is my hubbys birthday on the 27 dec  might go for a walk weather permiting  to a place called spike island my hubby used to like watching the mersey from there .  Take care  have a peaceful xmas  will be thinking of you  Syl x

Hi Jules,glad you had a nice week catching up with friends and finishing your last shift at work,to be honest Jules I have had a awful week haven't stopped crying I seem to be anxious about everything I am a born pessimist my hubby was just the opposite, now I haven't got him to reassure me that things are ok went to the Dr's she has put me on a course of antidepressant, I haven't taken them yet as the side affects are awful ,and to cap it all I have earing aids in both ears one of the things that go in your ear came off inside my left ear so ended up in A& E while they got it out . I just hope things get better as the week goes on as I'm e mailing you I have got my big light on to see if it makes me feel any better with it being lighter,sorry about being a bit miserable maybe it's the time of year, my daughter due home Saturday morning will be nice to see her it seems longer than 5 days since she went on holiday,she has had a nice time anyway,hopefully will see her sometime tomorrow.I did manage to take George out today then had a coffee with my friend maybe I feel  this way because all my activities have stopped till January I hope that's it and this feeling goes away once Christmas is over. I'm not burdening you any more Jules lol have a lovely Christmas and a peaceful new year to you and your loved ones e mail you after Xmas  regards syl x

Hi Syl,

You are not being a burden at all; that is what this chat forum is all about. Sometimes just getting out how you feel can help.  I am sure having your daughter away, the grotty weather and most of all missing our husband's at these special times of year always brings more emotions with it.  Glad you have been sensible and been to the docs but you will probably need to take the prescribed medication if it is to do you any good and just because there can be side effects does not necessarily mean you will have them.  Having the hearing aid problem cannot have helped but hope you will soon be feeling better and take those tiny baby steps we all speak off when things get us down.

Has been raining heavily on and off all day here but still went out with a friend this afternoon/early evening to a festive lights installation at Wembley (trying to find some festive spirit!!). Am off work now until 1st January and family begins to arrive on Christmas Eve but I will be online (here and there) so do not hesitate to drop me a message if you feel like talking. Best regards. Jules xx

Hi Jules, thanks for your kind words it is nice to talk to someone even though it's on line it does help,I do think a lot of it is this time of year and the dark nights as well as the dark mornings ,as well as all my activities stopping now till January, I still haven't taken the tablets the dr gave me ,but I can take them if I need to ,also hubbies birthday today the 27 th so that didn't help,I bought some flowers put them next to his picture and wished him happy birthday.   I did have a lovely Christmas with my daughter and her partner ,there was 8 of us out boxing day which was very nice I met my daughter's partner's mum for the first time ,she is very nice.they enjoyed New York even though it was very cold, hope you had a nice Christmas with your family  and enjoyed the festivities have been to town today quite busy with the sales being on got a few bits I needed then home went my neighbours for coffee and a chat which is always nice. anyway have a lovely new year I will have a buffet and a couple of glasses of wine watch the fireworks on the TV then bed regards e mail you in 2020 syl x

Hi Syl,

Like you I appreciate the contact that the forum gives me even after all this time.  Mutual understanding despite different lives/journey's certainly helps.

Thought of you on the 27th and know it will have been emotional as the 3rd will be for me.  Somehow we go forward into another new year and hope the winter will not be too severe.  I do find being able to get out every day makes a difference to how I feel.

Really pleased you enjoyed your Christmas festivities.  Our's went pretty much to plan with my daughter and family staying three days (went home afternoon of 27th with some food goodies (to stop me eating them all!!) and my son (who had a heavy cold bless him) and family were all with us on Christmas Day before going to the in-laws for Boxing Day.  We all got out walking children and dog, them every day and me missing Christmas Day as they went out whilst I and my son in law cleared up and got the place ready for the afternoon of playtime and evening buffet.

Gym re-opened today so I was there before heading into town for a coffee break and a quick look in M&S. Tomorrow depending on the weather I will either go walking with my camera or go to the cinema which will break up the day.  Am back at work on 1st Jan so making the most of my time off.  At least I know this will have been my last time working retail in the build up to Christmas and can now hopefully look forward to complete retirement by mid-Summer.

Wishing you all the very best for the New Year and beyond. Take care,  Jules x

Hi Jules, glad all went well over Christmas and you all had a nice time even though your son had a cold,it's the time of year when someone we know has either a cough or cold .I'm glad it over now and we can all get back to normal, I had a quiet new year just did a little buffet up for myself and watched the new year in with BBC 1  and the fireworks over the Thames which were very good. weather been quite good this week,dry even though it's been cold managed to take George out most days he bought me a lovely cup with his photo on via his mum and dad lol and some nice mint chocolate biscuits,I will nip into town tomorrow don't want much ,but will nip into boots for my blood pressure tablets and my inhaler, after dinner will have a coffee with my neighbor ,hope to take George out but it has forecast rain for tomorrow  so will have to wait and see if it does rain. will think of you on the 3rd it's still hard at certain times of the year which I don't think  will ever go away really ,at least my swimming is back next week have a nice weekend regards syl x

Hi Syl,

Weather has been dry for some days now but still rather overcast most of the time.  I did not see New Year in (very unusual for me) as I was working on New Years Day.  My normal working week so already back to routine really.  

Yestereday I laid flowers at hubby's resting place after going to the gym.  I then caught the bus to meet up with my son and after our usual wander/purchases at the garden centre we headed back to his and I spent the afternoon out walking with the family followed by a lovely roast dinner.  My daughter in law dropped me home around 9pm as she had some bits to drop of at her parents' place (they live about half a miles from me).  All in all a peaceful day whilst making new memories and cherishing the old ones.

Today I am doing some catching up with mail, housework and am awaiting a call so that I can organise my phone upgrade (no doubt more fun when it comes trying to get used to it!!). As it is dry though a little chilly I might try and do a little tidying in the garden and get the new feeder fixed up.

Hope you have a pleasant weekend.  Jules x

Hi Jules, glad everything back to normal now went my swimming aerobics class Tuesday for the first time it was nice to get back after the Christmas break,my friendship group back Monday 13th so am looking forward to seeing everyone after such a long break. the weather. not to bad this week took George out this afternoon even the sun was shining but it has forecast rain tomorrow, a few week ago my friend went out for a meal with a group of friends and won afternoon tea ,so I am going with her tomorrow  it's called the everglades it's a hotel and they have a restaurant as well so it should be nice.think I am out with my daughter and her partner Sunday for dinner she has got some  vouchers off a Sunday lunch in one of our local pubs and it runs out Sunday so we might as well use them up rather than waste them .have a nice weekend regards Syl x

Hi Syl,

Hope you enjoyed your return to the friendship group and also Sunday lumch with your daughter and her partner.  I do enjoy eating out and not having to clear up afterwards!

Weather good here last Friday so after my usual gym routine I got the underground to Kew and spent the day walking for pleasure.  So lovely to be out in the fresh air.  Saturday caught up with stuff around the house and then on Sunday went walking locally in the morning followed by shopping in the afternoon.  So mild for the time of year but expect we will get a cold spell eventually.  Have not even had the heating on for the last few days.

Have been chatting to a good friend who I often go out with and we have booked up a theatre trip in February and also tickets booked for the Chelsea Flower Show this year.  We have been looking at doing the latter for several years and although a bit pricey decided this year we would finally go along.  Work has been quite miserable recently with morale low all round (retail not what it used to be!!) so these things to look forward to are a great boost.

Also just been invited by my daughter and son in law to join them on a mini break to Lincolnshire during the boys' Easter school holidays so managed to get the time off work and really looking forward to spending quality time with them.  I must be doing something right as also seeing them during the February half term (also when both my children have birthdays). Definitely helps keeping busy and having things to do.

Some not so good news though as one of my very close friend's husband has spent the last week in hospital following being taken in by ambulance from his GP's surgery with what they are currently calling urinary sepsis.  They are a train ride away but the hospital is closed to visitors just now due to the novovirus being on various wards.  All I can do is stay in touch by phone and have sent thinking/get well cards too.  Sometimes you just feel helpless in these situations.

Hope the afternoon tea lived up to expectations and that you are keeping okay.  Take care and have a good week.  Jules

Hi Jules, enjoyed my friendship group we were discussing what we were going to do during the year, and what speakers to ask to do talks .glad you enjoyed your walk ,it is nice to get out especially this time of year when the weather isn't that good,I'm sure you will enjoy your theatre trip and the flower show it's nice to have things to look forward to.I know it's a miserable time of year everyone Sims to be down in the dumps in January.at least you have the weekend to enjoy with your daughter son in law and grandchildren at Easter ,I don't even know when it is this year,sorry to hear about you friends husband sepsis is so dangerous but it is easily cured if caught in time apparently they don't seem to test for it which to me seems wrong ,my afternoon tea was a bit of a disappointment tiny sandwiches and even tinier cakes but it was free so I suppose it was expected,not sure what I'm doing at the weekend, Saturday I am going the crematorium as its my dads birthday so will put flowers on the plot for him,it has forecast a dry weekend not sure what I'm doing Sunday regarding dinner will have to wait and see what happens enjoy your weekend regards syl x

Hi Syl,

A shame that the afternoon tea was not up to scratch but, as you say, it was a freebie so a bit of a bonus.

After a busy couple of days at work, I have enjoyed being off and the weather being dry and sunny for a change.  On Friday my son and two grandchildren visited for a few hours along with a friend who popped in for pre-arranged coffee/chat.  My friend's son went to school with my lad and she was delighted to catch up with him and the family whom she had only heard about over the years.  The children played happily building a 'new home' in my kitchen made out of all their toys followed by some 'organised clearing up' toddler style. A lot of fun.  

Over the weekend I managed two long walks and it is good being out and seeing other people rather than spending too much time in front of the tv/computer.  Also finished a book and have started a new one.  

We have two ladies leaving work this week and next week so have  got necessary cards and will be sorry to see them go.  They have both been there over 20 years and are disillusioned under the new management.  Sadly morale is at an all time low and it does affect everyone.  Had a director in but it was on a day I do not work but I think he got the message.  Fingers crossed I will be in a position to retire as planned in mid-Summer.

On Monday the weather though chilly was lovely and sunny so I decided to go walking in London and visited the Olympic Park at Stratford, walking the tow path by the river and then the circuit around the stadium now home to West Ham.  They had a beautiful display of daffodils on the  banks; so pretty and gives you a lift to know Spring is hopefully round the corner.  I have a few crocus out which is early but my daffs are no where near flowering so suspect those I say had been 'brought on' before planting out.

Today I have a gym session but no other plans.  Heavy frost at the moment but bright so may go for a short walk and save my food shop for another day.

Have a pleasant week  and take care. Jules  x[[]]

Hi Syl,

A shame that the afternoon tea was not up to scratch but, as you say, it was a freebie so a bit of a bonus.

After a busy couple of days at work, I have enjoyed being off and the weather being dry and sunny for a change.  On Friday my son and two grandchildren visited for a few hours along with a friend who popped in for pre-arranged coffee/chat.  My friend's son went to school with my lad and she was delighted to catch up with him and the family whom she had only heard about over the years.  The children played happily building a 'new home' in my kitchen made out of all their toys followed by some 'organised clearing up' toddler style. A lot of fun.  

Over the weekend I managed two long walks and it is good being out and seeing other people rather than spending too much time in front of the tv/computer.  Also finished a book and have started a new one.  

We have two ladies leaving work this week and next week so have  got necessary cards and will be sorry to see them go.  They have both been there over 20 years and are disillusioned under the new management.  Sadly morale is at an all time low and it does affect everyone.  Had a director in but it was on a day I do not work but I think he got the message.  Fingers crossed I will be in a position to retire as planned in mid-Summer.

On Monday the weather though chilly was lovely and sunny so I decided to go walking in London and visited the Olympic Park at Stratford, walking the tow path by the river and then the circuit around the stadium now home to West Ham.  They had a beautiful display of daffodils on the  banks; so pretty and gives you a lift to know Spring is hopefully round the corner.  I have a few crocus out which is early but my daffs are no where near flowering so suspect those I say had been 'brought on' before planting out.

Today I have a gym session but no other plans.  Heavy frost at the moment but bright so may go for a short walk and save my food shop for another day.

Have a pleasant week  and take care. Jules  x[[]]

Hi Jules, lovely display of daffodils it does make you think of spring, we have a few dotted about but not as nice as those it is colder in the north so things take longer to come out .sorry your not enjoying work at the moment but at least you haven't got long to go now,I don't think shops are having a easy time at the moment with the internet and people buying on line ,it's a shame really as quite a lot of well known shops are closing down . I went to my daughter's last Sunday for dinner which is always. nice ,my son and his partner went to Wales for the weekend in a dog friendly hotel be sent me some photos of the hotel it was lovely the weather was. nice as well,I think the dog enjoyed more than they did lol .went to my aerobics class this morning she is on about retiring this year but hopefully she has got a friend who might do the class for her (fingers crossed)  she will do it for her she is a lovely person she will be sadly missed if she does decide to leave ,ha2 had George out all this week the weather hasn't been to bad it's been quite misty all week most days have been really miserable and dull but at least it's been dry think I'm out Sunday for dinner to a local restaurant they do a lovely Sunday lunch so am looking forward to going  I am at the hospital Wednesday so they can have a look at my right ear as I am having problems with it  enjoy. your weekend regards syl x

Hi Syl,

Hope, if your aerobics teacher does retire she can get you a replacement as know you enjoy it and the routine it brings into the week.

Past few days have been very dull and currently it is raining so have been looking to inside activitities.  Did the Big Garden Birdwatch for an hour on Saturday, was at the gym Friday and Sunday mornings and today I popped into the cinema to catch a film whilst in town shopping.  Apparently tomorrow is supposed to be a bit brighter so hoping to get more a proper walk after my gym session.

Hope you enjoyed the Sunday lunch and hope the visit to the hospital with your right ear on Wednesday can bring you some relief.  I have a blocked left ear and hate the muffled effect but luckily no pain so hoping the drop will clear it up.

Have a good week.  Jules x

Hi Jules, I also did the bird watch Saturday the only bird that didn't come down in my hour was the doves I usually have 2 that appear,but it was a pleasant hour watching them come down into the garden.yes I enjoyed my lunch with the kids and my daughter's partner it was a lovely meal I just had a2 course the others had 3 I was full up by the time we finished but it was very nice,the weather hasn't been to bad here have managed to take George out all week had some rain but it's not been that cold which makes a change,went to the hospital Wednesday the doctor thinks my tubes you have in your ear nose and throat are blocked,have have got a spray to put up my nose also have have also got to get from the chemist a otovent apparently it's a balloon you blow up then release into your mouth it's supposed to get rid of mucus sounds very complicated will have to ask them how to do it,it does show you on my tablet but will ask them just to make sure,I am out Saturday with my friends at the community centre for a cream tea bingo and a raffle so something to look forward  to at the weekend Sunday I am at my daughter's for dinner have a lovely weekend regards Syl x

Hi Syl

Glad you had a good week and hope the treatment from the hospital for your blocked tubes  works for you as must be frustrating.  Have been using drops from chemist for my 'muffled left ear' and they appear to be doing something as there is a slight improvement so far.

My son and two youngest grandchildren popped in for a couple of hours on Friday afternoon which was a nice surprise as had not planned it.  Weekend itself was pretty quiet with just usual gym sessions and shopping.  Yesterday met a friend for coffee and a browse around the town.  We both found a couple of bits in the never-ending sales.  Today I have just returned from a trip to the cinema.  I saw 1917 and it was very well acted and not surprised it won a few BAFTAs - a poignant war time drama. Now just need to get through my two work shifts this week and am looking forward to Friday when I can get to my hair appointment.  It is definitely ready for it's trim!  Only a couple of weeks now until i see my daughter and family for a few days which will be our first catch up since Christmas.  

Take care and have a pleasant week ahead.  Jules x

Hi Jules,I am using the balloon you have to blow them up with your nose take a deep breath then swallow weird apparently a lot of kids do it for glue ear  I have noticed my right ear cracking when I do it ,its got to be done for 3 wk three times a day will have to see if it clears it .glad your family popped in to see you must have been a nice surprise when it wasn't expected,I enjoyed my cream tea at the community centre lovely sandwiches and cakes we also had a glass of wine ,unfortunately we didn't win bingo or the raffle but we had a nice time anyway. weather not bad this week took George out most days we have had a couple of frosty days but it's supposed to be wet and windy for the weekend so probably won't go far Saturday thing I am out for dinner Sunday with my daughter and her partner,Monday I am at my friendship group we are having a talk on neighbour hood watch have a nice weekend regards syl x

Hi Syl,

Hoping your area not too badly affected by the terrible stormy weather over the last 24hrs or so.  Luckily apart from a few twigs in the garden and having to stay indoors for safety all well here.

The 'balloon' treatment sounds rather bizarre but do hope it does the trick. I certainly had not heard of it before but assume it is a special balloon and not just any party one you have hanging around ha ha.

With the weather forecast looking bad for Sunday I changed my plans and took a long walk on Saturday instead.  Managed four and a half mile stroll around three lakes (about an hour away by public transport). One of the lakes is a nature reserve and though a bit muddy along the walkway managed quite well even though I just had ordinary boots on (sensible walkers had their wellies!!).  It was very peaceful and took some pictures along the way (there are also hides provided if you are a more serious birdwatcher).  Back my mid afternoon so it was a latish lunch but well worth it.

Very boring on Sunday being stuck inside but at least the housework all up to date so today have just been to the gym (as I missed yesterday) and grabbed a few bits from the shops.  My daughter's birthday on the 14th and going to see the family next week so looking forward to some quality time catching up.

Hope your weekend went well and that you have a pleasant week.  Will chat again when back from my visiting.  Take care of yourself. Jules x

Hi Jules,weather awful here as well strong winds we were going out last Sunday for lunch but we rang and cancelled ,it even blew my window out of my garage luckily it's only a small window,my son is going to board it up he thinks the wood has rotted so it's easier just to board it up.still went my friendship group we had a talk on neighborhood watch,came home with loads of leaflets on home safety and how to keep yourself safe,very good really simple things but good to do.glad you enjoyed your walks it is nice to walk in the country side it really does lift your spirits,I don't know what you'd views are on HS2 I think it's going to be disastrous for the  country side forests and some communities ,and there's no guarantee it's going to work anyway ,have been town this morning for a few bits ,then took George out its only the second time this week because of the weather,having coffee with my friend at one.it's forecast a nother bad weekend I'm sick of this weather now ( roll on summer) enjoy your weekend with your daughter regards Syl x

Hi Syl

Hope you survived the second storm. Sorry to hear you lost a garage window but lucky no one hurt.

Not at all happy about HS2; so much of our local land has already been churned up in preparation and cannot see the point of it myself.  Not only costing a fortunue already but no doubt will be expensive to use and all the for sake of a few minutes knocked off the journey.  No doubt commuters will be happier though may have a long wait before it becomes a reality!  Not as bad here as the first one thankfully but plenty of rain.  Luckily afterwards it was  mainly dry whilst at my daughters and we were able to do the short walks that her dog was allowed after his little op.  Was lovely having some quality catch up time with them all and they gave me a lift back before heading off to spend a day or two wil my son in law's gran before the half term holidays end.  Now to look forward to my holiday with them in April.  My son and family are spending this week in Fishguard with friends and have had some lovely sunshine!!

Whilst away I booked a visit to the theatre and will be going on Saturday so am looking forward to that and then a couple of days before my return to normal work shifts.  Will return to my gym sessions on Sunday too.  

Hope your ear has seen some improvement from the balloon treatment.  Take care.  Jules x

Hi Jules, glad you enjoyed your weekend with your daughter and taking her dog for a walk,my ear doesn't seem as bad still doing the balloon treatment, I am at the hospital Thursday for a CT scan just routine hope everything is ok you always worry it's only natural I suppose,the weather awful again only had George out twice this week. the weekend isn't that good either am out Sunday with the kids to a local pub,it was one of my hubbies favourites as he has been dead 4 years Sunday I can't believe 4 years has passed since I saw him ,heard his voice heard him laugh so sad ,I will go the crematorium and put some flowers in a vase , I put a verse in the memory book so will have a look at that as well I still sit and cry just wish  I  knew I was going to see him again one day . where are you going in April?it isn't that far off now ,hope you enjoy the theatre what are you going to see ? I'm not into musicals don't mind variety shows , I might go to our local museum Saturday there's a art exhibition on a local man died months ago and his family found pictures that he drew and painted ,there supposed to be very good on the same scale as lowery it ends Sunday so would be nice to see them before it closes. have a nice weekend regards Syl x

Hi Syl,

Am pleased that your balloon treatment seems to be helping and hope your routine scan on Thursday brings further good news for you.  It is hard not to be anxious when these check ups come round so hope you feel relieved once it is done/results in.  

My daughter had her own heart check up last Thursday and all was okay so next routine check up in two years time.  Know she felt the relief even though was not expecting any problems.

I expect the anniversary of your husband's passing was a sad day of reflection. I always look at the book of remembrance on the anniversary of my hubby's death. Feel blessed that we had so many years together though cheated that we cannot share retirement years. Nowadays I just try and enjoy the life I have been blessed with as feel this is how he would want me to honour him. Not sure what else I could do to be honest.

I enjoyed the trip to the theatre. I do enjoy good entertainment and like a variety of things.  This was the musical based on the film The Wedding Singer and loved the dancing routines and overall story. Went to a matinee performance and enjoyed live music in the foyer before the show whilst having a coffee.  Treated mysef to a fish and chip supper on the way home (naughty but nice ha ha).

More entertainment today with a trip to the cinema.  The weather is so awful (still very windy and wet) so am missing my walks.  This time I saw Call of the Wild on the recommendation of a friend and it was very good.  The cinema is undergoing a re-fit but they manage to keep some of the screens running.  First time visit to one of the new screens and lovely and comfy with plenty of leg room (I am tall) and reclining seats.  Am wondering how long it will be before they put up the 'budget' prices.

The April holiday is to a little self-catering cottage that my daughter and son in law have booked  in Lincolnshire so weather permitting will be ideal for taking their dog/children walking.  Not an area I have holidayed in before though did once have a weekend in Lincoln with friends.  Fingers crossed Spring will be well under way by then!

Did you get to your local museum  for the art exhibition?

Well, one more day before I return to work on Wednesday and find out what has changed since I was last in.

Take care, all the very best for Thursday and have a peaceful weekend.  Regards  Jules x