Syliva, I am so very sorry for your loss, I know how it feels, my husband passed away in October and I miss him so much, I too wish they could let us know they are ok.  There are lots of people on here going through the same terrible time who will offer support.  Sending love to you Debbie xxxxxx

Hi debbie, how are you havnt heard off you in a while i feel ok at the moment health wise ,got to go the hospital next month  to see about my breathing me and the kids just having a quite xmas dinner we will go to the crem  to put flowers on my parents grave ,we will put some flowers in a vase for my hubby ,it is my hubbys birthday on the 27 dec  might go for a walk weather permiting  to a place called spike island my hubby used to like watching the mersey from there .  Take care  have a peaceful xmas  will be thinking of you  Syl x

Hi Jules, glad your grandson is feeling much better now it's not nice when there not well ,the weather not good here as well all the gardens are sodden so can't do much out side at the moment,apart from dodge the rain to feed the  birds lol , havnt had George out much this week as well ,went to the optician last Saturday as I had a small blood. clot behind my left eye 3 month ago so had to go back to see if it had disappeared luckily it's gone now. I wish I could walk like you Jules,I've been struggling to take George out just lately with.my breathing,so went the doctors this week  have got to go the hospital for a chest  x ray  bit scared really considering I've all ready got COPD I'm a born pessimist so I'm thinking all sorts at the moment. must be lovely to live that near London with everything there is to see and do there.started back swimming aerobics really enjoyed it and the water was nice and warm ( which makes a change) as well,not got anything planned for the weekend up to now my son is in Birmingham at the weekend catching up with friends he used to work with,not back with his partner but they are texting one another will have to see what happens next . have a nice weekend  regards syl x

Hi Syl,

The weather certainly has been pretty awful especially in the north of the country from the pictures on the tv I have seen.  We have had plenty of rain in the past week and it does curtail what and how far I go. Thankfully yesterday had a beautiful day and once again I got out and managed to stroll three parks in London and really enjoyed the relaxation that brings.  I do consider myself very lucky to still be able to do this and if hubby's death taught me anything it was not to take anything (or anyone) for granted so it means a lot that I have this choice just now.

Hope the chest x ray is sorted for you quickly and whilst I can imagine your anxiety with a bit of luck it will just show them how to treat your breathing problems with perhaps alternative medication.  Wish you all the very best as must be frustrating that you cannot enjoy those walks with George even when the weather allows.

Today has started bright again but rain due later so once my mail is up to date and the washing up down I will try and do my weekly shop in the dry.  Other than that just next weekend to look forward to when out with friends.  Just need to get through my two work days in the middle of the week (lift is out of order so lots of moving goods by hand up and down stairs...........exercise I could do without haha) and then having my hair cut on Friday.  Still not sure how I manage to fit everything done but am also hoping to catch up with son and the grandchildren on Friday afternoon now that their bugs seem to have cleared up.

Hope you had a pleasant weekend.  Take care  Jules x

Hi Jules,not had any x ray results yet the Dr has put me on a stronger tablet which I inhale every morning will have to see how  I get on with that for now, been swimming aerobics this morning ,then I did a bit of shopping,then off to the community centre with my friends decided to have mushroom soup for a change ,wish I hadn't it was awful it was so spicey we only eaten half of it ,normally the meals are !lovely must be a different chef.glad your still enjoying your walks especially in london even though the weather isn't to good at the moment,I don't think it's good any where listening to the news.had a nice Sunday lunch last Sunday with the kids its a country pub we have been there a few times it's always a nice meal.I'm supposed to be going to a Christmas fair at the weekend with my daughter and her partner but it depends on the weather,as you have to park in a field with all the rain it might be to muddy to park and then we might. not be able to get off,not sure what's happening Sunday regarding dinner, have a nice weekend hope you manage to catch up with your grandchildren Friday regards syl x

Hi Syl,

Hope the new medication will improve things for you and I expect only time will tell as you have to wait to see how it goes.  With the colder weather my hip certainly feels it more but have a good cream pain relief which I use from time to time.

You have some lovely things to be getting on with even when you cannot get George out for his walks but sorry the soup did not live up to expections.  With the colder weather I do enjoy soup (I make batches and then freeze it) for my lunches and they are ideal whilst I am on the challenge at the gym I go to.  So far so good as have managed to lose 6lb and we are only half way through.  Will be back at the gym today for usual half hour circuit and then weigh in.  However will be pleased if I have just maintained my weight this week as had a very sociable five course meal whilst out with friends over the weekend.  It was a lovely evening with live soul singer who they have had before and he gets a good response from all ages.  After the meal there was the raffle (won some small snack dishes which will be very useful over the Christmas entertaining period) and then dancing till 11 pm.  Made a real change.

I saw my son and the children for a few hours on Friday and was lovely catching up with them.  Plans are afoot now for me to go to them in a couple of weeks for the weekend all being well. Have also had plenty of chats with my daughter so all in all it was a very good week (once the work shifts were done and dusted).

Was beautiful here yesterday with plenty of sunshine so went for a five mile stroll at Kew Gardens and put the camera to good use as well as plenty of interactions with other people there. One chap had settled himself by the side of the lake with his bags of seeds and was surrounded by geese, ducks and a pair of beautiful swans.  The male swan was sleeping at his feet and  it was a pleasure to be part of that world for a while.

Take care of yourself. Jules x

Hi Jules, my chest x ray came back ok no further action to be taken,so that is a good sign my breathing haven't been to bad since I started taking my new tablet that I inhale every morning ,let's hope it helps I know it won't get any better as there is no cure for COPD but for now it's manageable . the weather here is ok at the moment dry but cold took George out all week for his walk which I have enjoyed as well ,glad your enjoying the gym  and losing weight I think as we get older it's harder to lose the weight as well,glad you enjoyed your night out with friends ,and a five course meal as well as winning the raffle it is nice to have a night out  and enjoy a nice meal with friends.glad you enjoyed your stroll round Kew gardens and see the birds. and other wild life I also love nature , it's awful what humans are doing to this planet with no thought for animals or nature ,went to a garden centre last Saturday with my daughter it's a massive centre it was packed she only just managed to park,she bought a few bits I bought her a reindeer wooden head (it's cute) for christmas then we had coffee and cake before we came home , then Sunday I went out with  my son for Sunday lunch went to a local carvery it was very nice. doing some shopping tomorrow,not got anything planned for the weekend as yet .enjoy your weekend regards syl x

Hi Syl,

Brilliant news about the chest x-ray and that the new medication is also helping with your breathing.  This must give you some relief and improved quality of life too.  Lovely to read that you have been able to get out with George too.  Weather has been up and down since my lovely day at Kew so glad I made the most of that opportunity.

I also love wandering those large garden centres and it is indeed rare that I come away empty handed ha ha.  Every year I promise myself that I do not need any more Christmas bits but alwayws manage to find something to add.  This year I am hosting Christmas for the first time since hubby died so have added some 'jolly Father Christmas' plates for the childrens' table settings.  There will be nine of us plus my daughter's dog as they are staying for a few days.  My son's Westie is staying with the in-laws as they visit them on Boxing Day and she does not appreciate lively pups!!

Weather over the weekend was not very pleasant; drizzling and dull so no long walks but instead managed to finish my Christmas shopping and catch up on tidying the house (does not take long!!).  I also brought in a few of the bird feeders for a good clean out.  I tend to do them on rotation so that there is always something out.  I have a robin coming regularly to the  back door in the mornings for his handful before the sparrows/pigeons/starlings etc gather.  Gives me a lot of pleasure to sit and watch them in the warmth as my chair is directly opposite the garden view.  Wish I had had the opportunity to mow the lawn before it got so wet but no chance now.  At least it is still lovely and green but most of the leaves have now left my maple tree so I have a layer of red leaves  which will eventually mulch down in the flower bed.  Only other colour just now are the winter pansies and cyclamen as the only heavy frost finished off the dahlias and bowdeni nerinii (not sure thats the right spelling!!).

Supermarket shop later but then a pretty routine week though I am at my son's next Saturday so will look forward to playing with the grandchildren and catching up with their news.

Take care and have a pleasant week.  Jules x

Hi Jules, weather not to bad at the moment ,I didn't manage to do my lawn either it's so wet at the moment,managed to cut some of my bushes down and put then in my green bin as its the last time they come now till March, your good getting all your presents for Xmas I give money to everyone I haven't got a big family ,I do buy them a few bits to open  Christmas day I still don't know what's happening Christmas day,I have got a feeling my son is going to spend  Christmas day with his x partner and her kids as they are still friends,they booked a pub lunch for Xmas  so I think that is still on,so I think I will be at my daughter's.must be lovely to spend time with all your family especially with your grandchildren,that is one thing I miss not having any ,but it wasn't meant to be.have been to town this morning also went into Costa for coffee and a toasted tea cake which was very nice .I'm out tomorrow to a Christmas fare with my two friends it's at the baths where I do my swimming aerobics  might find a few things I can wrap up for presents,I'm off to my friends now for one more coffee lol , enjoy your weekend regards syl x

Hi Syl,

Hope you had a good weekend. Beautiful morning last Friday so after the gym went walking instead of coming back home. Popped into the cafe for a coffee en route and also my local garden centre to stock up on bird food. Chilly but dry here so had a good day on Saturday spent with my son and family. Nice walk over their local park  with my grand-daughter on her bike and grandson taking his first outside walk with new shoes..............very cute indeed.  My son made a lovely curry for us all before the little ones went to bed and then we watched Strictly altogether before he dropped me home.  On Sunday  was back to my usual gym routine and then went to the monthly foodies market before another walk in the sunshine.

Monday was my usual supermarket shop (still that gives me a couple of miles walking) and then pottering at home.  As a lovely start here again today am putting housework on hold and catching the underground to a park I have not visited before.  They have a museum of local area history as well as extensive grounds and have been told by a friend that it will give me a good workout ha ha!!

My daughter, grandsons and the dog are visiting Saturday to Sunday and my son and family hope to pop in to meet the dog (otherwise they will catch up over Christmas dinner!!).

Not had such a good week as far as healthy eating is concerned so expect the scales to reflect this at my weigh in later.  It is hard to stay away from the festive food which is around but still a couple of weeks left of my gym's challenge so need to gather some willpower!!

Our green garden waste is weekly throughout the year, the same as general and recyclable waste so we are very lucky to be able to get rid of it.  That being said still too wet underfoot to do much other than gather fallen leaves and I pop these in the part of the garden for wildlife.. My pair of robins are regular morning visitors now it is so much colder and my first duty before breakfast is to give them their daily feed(they are usual down before it is light and think they have worked out that this beats the pigeons to the seeds).

So the days move on and back into work tomorrow and Thursday. 

Hope you soon know how you will be spending Christmas.  As a family we usually have the conversation in October and this helps us all budget/plan. This will be my first Christmas hosting without hubby so feels rather poignant but he would love the fact that we will all be celebrating together at least on Christmas Day. Sometimes it is hard to believe it will be five years on 3rd January since his death; other times it feels like yesterday. He absolutely loved this time of year so will definitely raise a glass in his memory.  Also my first year without Mum so all seems a little disjointed at the moment as used to have to plan visits to the care home/gifts etc.  Still  life has to go on and 
I do enjoy seeing childrens' faces when they see the Christmas Tree and lounge all decorated.  That reminds me to start 'unearthing' the decorations after they leave this weekend and also get the tree from local garden centre (thankfully free home delivery).

Hope you are feeling well and the new medication continues to help with the breathing.  Best regards. Jules x

Hi Jules,glad your enjoying the nice weather for now I have just come back from my friends was going to take George out but its just started raining ,will have to give it a miss now till tomorrow.went to the Xmas fare last Saturday it is only a small hall but there was some nice things there ,we didn't manage to buy anything  it we had a coffee and a sausage roll which was nice ,I will be spending Christmas day with my daughter and her partner ,my son spending Christmas day with his x partner and her kids I have a feeling they are going to try and make another go of there relationship only time will tell if it will work this time.there is 5 of us going to a country pub on boxing day  for a meal so that should be nice,before all that my daughter and her partner are going to new York on the 15  and don't come back till the 20th so will be a bit of a rush when they get back getting  everything organized for the 25th it's sad for a lot of people this time of year it's nearly 4 years since my hubby died,I can't believe it either also his birthday on the 27December so it's hard  for me as well . think I'm at my daughter's Sunday for dinner might nip into town Saturday this week instead of Friday as there is a Xmas market on its usually all down the streets so it's quite good hope the weather is ok has they have forecast rain I will still go as its nice to see all the stalls dressed up for christmas.enjoy your weekend regards syl x

Hi Syl,

Sorry for the late response but it has been really busy this week and trying to fit everything in  has meant less time on the laptop!

Hope you had a loevely meal with your daughter last Sunday and perhaps made it to the Xmas market.  We have an artisan/foodies market all this weekend so will go along for a wander and stock up on local cheese and bread.  Had coffee with a friend this afternoon and have social catch ups with other friends on Monday, Tuesday and Friday next week before hopefully have a relaxing weekend immediately before the festivities begin.  Thankfully once my two work shifts done this week I am then off until I return on 1st January so a nice break.

Take care and let's hope the weather allows us to do what we want to do!!  Jules x

Hi Syl,

Sorry for the late response but it has been really busy this week and trying to fit everything in  has meant less time on the laptop!

Hope you had a loevely meal with your daughter last Sunday and perhaps made it to the Xmas market.  We have an artisan/foodies market all this weekend so will go along for a wander and stock up on local cheese and bread.  Had coffee with a friend this afternoon and have social catch ups with other friends on Monday, Tuesday and Friday next week before hopefully have a relaxing weekend immediately before the festivities begin.  Thankfully once my two work shifts done this week I am then off until I return on 1st January so a nice break.

Take care and let's hope the weather allows us to do what we want to do!!  Jules x

Hi Jules, I thought that would be why I hadn't heard off you lol ,went to a local garden centre last Monday with my friendship group for a Xmas lunch  which was very nice it's our last one now till January,also my aerobics has finished now till  January ,went my community centre Saturday with my friend for a Christmas party ,really enjoyed it we had a raffle and entertainment didn't get home till 5 it's was a nice afternoon.as I'm e mailing you my daughter is at the airport  on her way to New York, they are back Friday so it will be all rush when she gets back,I asked her if she wanted me to do anything  but she said no so I will leave it up to her to get things done ,I have bought a few things so will drop them off at hers when I check the house this week, I should have been going to a local school this week as well for another Xmas dinner but they had to cancel as the pupils have gone down with a sickness bug ,but they are going to reschedule for January,so it will be something to look forward to when thinks have died down after Xmas enjoy your time with friends enjoy your week regards syl x

Hi Syl,

I think lots of places are finishing up for Christmas now even though the local schools do not finish until Friday.  Will be very happy to finish my final work shift before Christmas on Thursday and thus will miss out on the manic last retail days ha ha.  

My weekend was okay and I did manage both the gym and the Artisan Market on Sunday so have stocked up on local cheeses ready for the cheeseboard lovers(both son and son in law prefer this to traditional Christmas pudding).

Today's planned catch up was re-arranged for the New Year as my friend had to go with her brother to a diabetic clinic to help set up his injections (he is in his seventies and they are trying to get his levels sorted but he has not injected before.  Instead I went and did the frozen items for the festivities so another tick in the box.

Hope your daughter enjoys her trip and am sure you will all have a lovely time catching up on all the news over the Christmas period.

At the gym early tomorrow and then out to lunch though not quite sure where yet.  We usually go to a really good local indian but they are not open at lunchtimes so it may by another nearby restaurant or perhaps fish and chips.  Happy with whatever my friend fancies (she will be driving) but will be lovely to have a chat as will not see her and her husband again until the New Year.  Her husband is not coming as is still recovering from a nasty cold.

Weather pretty dull but at least not cold so saving on the heating bills ha ha.  Have a good week. Jules x

Hi Jules,glad you had a nice week catching up with friends and finishing your last shift at work,to be honest Jules I have had a awful week haven't stopped crying I seem to be anxious about everything I am a born pessimist my hubby was just the opposite, now I haven't got him to reassure me that things are ok went to the Dr's she has put me on a course of antidepressant, I haven't taken them yet as the side affects are awful ,and to cap it all I have earing aids in both ears one of the things that go in your ear came off inside my left ear so ended up in A& E while they got it out . I just hope things get better as the week goes on as I'm e mailing you I have got my big light on to see if it makes me feel any better with it being lighter,sorry about being a bit miserable maybe it's the time of year, my daughter due home Saturday morning will be nice to see her it seems longer than 5 days since she went on holiday,she has had a nice time anyway,hopefully will see her sometime tomorrow.I did manage to take George out today then had a coffee with my friend maybe I feel  this way because all my activities have stopped till January I hope that's it and this feeling goes away once Christmas is over. I'm not burdening you any more Jules lol have a lovely Christmas and a peaceful new year to you and your loved ones e mail you after Xmas  regards syl x

Hi Syl,

You are not being a burden at all; that is what this chat forum is all about. Sometimes just getting out how you feel can help.  I am sure having your daughter away, the grotty weather and most of all missing our husband's at these special times of year always brings more emotions with it.  Glad you have been sensible and been to the docs but you will probably need to take the prescribed medication if it is to do you any good and just because there can be side effects does not necessarily mean you will have them.  Having the hearing aid problem cannot have helped but hope you will soon be feeling better and take those tiny baby steps we all speak off when things get us down.

Has been raining heavily on and off all day here but still went out with a friend this afternoon/early evening to a festive lights installation at Wembley (trying to find some festive spirit!!). Am off work now until 1st January and family begins to arrive on Christmas Eve but I will be online (here and there) so do not hesitate to drop me a message if you feel like talking. Best regards. Jules xx

Hi Jules, thanks for your kind words it is nice to talk to someone even though it's on line it does help,I do think a lot of it is this time of year and the dark nights as well as the dark mornings ,as well as all my activities stopping now till January, I still haven't taken the tablets the dr gave me ,but I can take them if I need to ,also hubbies birthday today the 27 th so that didn't help,I bought some flowers put them next to his picture and wished him happy birthday.   I did have a lovely Christmas with my daughter and her partner ,there was 8 of us out boxing day which was very nice I met my daughter's partner's mum for the first time ,she is very nice.they enjoyed New York even though it was very cold, hope you had a nice Christmas with your family  and enjoyed the festivities have been to town today quite busy with the sales being on got a few bits I needed then home went my neighbours for coffee and a chat which is always nice. anyway have a lovely new year I will have a buffet and a couple of glasses of wine watch the fireworks on the TV then bed regards e mail you in 2020 syl x

Hi Syl,

Like you I appreciate the contact that the forum gives me even after all this time.  Mutual understanding despite different lives/journey's certainly helps.

Thought of you on the 27th and know it will have been emotional as the 3rd will be for me.  Somehow we go forward into another new year and hope the winter will not be too severe.  I do find being able to get out every day makes a difference to how I feel.

Really pleased you enjoyed your Christmas festivities.  Our's went pretty much to plan with my daughter and family staying three days (went home afternoon of 27th with some food goodies (to stop me eating them all!!) and my son (who had a heavy cold bless him) and family were all with us on Christmas Day before going to the in-laws for Boxing Day.  We all got out walking children and dog, them every day and me missing Christmas Day as they went out whilst I and my son in law cleared up and got the place ready for the afternoon of playtime and evening buffet.

Gym re-opened today so I was there before heading into town for a coffee break and a quick look in M&S. Tomorrow depending on the weather I will either go walking with my camera or go to the cinema which will break up the day.  Am back at work on 1st Jan so making the most of my time off.  At least I know this will have been my last time working retail in the build up to Christmas and can now hopefully look forward to complete retirement by mid-Summer.

Wishing you all the very best for the New Year and beyond. Take care,  Jules x

Hi Jules, glad all went well over Christmas and you all had a nice time even though your son had a cold,it's the time of year when someone we know has either a cough or cold .I'm glad it over now and we can all get back to normal, I had a quiet new year just did a little buffet up for myself and watched the new year in with BBC 1  and the fireworks over the Thames which were very good. weather been quite good this week,dry even though it's been cold managed to take George out most days he bought me a lovely cup with his photo on via his mum and dad lol and some nice mint chocolate biscuits,I will nip into town tomorrow don't want much ,but will nip into boots for my blood pressure tablets and my inhaler, after dinner will have a coffee with my neighbor ,hope to take George out but it has forecast rain for tomorrow  so will have to wait and see if it does rain. will think of you on the 3rd it's still hard at certain times of the year which I don't think  will ever go away really ,at least my swimming is back next week have a nice weekend regards syl x

Hi Syl,

Weather has been dry for some days now but still rather overcast most of the time.  I did not see New Year in (very unusual for me) as I was working on New Years Day.  My normal working week so already back to routine really.  

Yestereday I laid flowers at hubby's resting place after going to the gym.  I then caught the bus to meet up with my son and after our usual wander/purchases at the garden centre we headed back to his and I spent the afternoon out walking with the family followed by a lovely roast dinner.  My daughter in law dropped me home around 9pm as she had some bits to drop of at her parents' place (they live about half a miles from me).  All in all a peaceful day whilst making new memories and cherishing the old ones.

Today I am doing some catching up with mail, housework and am awaiting a call so that I can organise my phone upgrade (no doubt more fun when it comes trying to get used to it!!). As it is dry though a little chilly I might try and do a little tidying in the garden and get the new feeder fixed up.

Hope you have a pleasant weekend.  Jules x

Hi Jules, glad everything back to normal now went my swimming aerobics class Tuesday for the first time it was nice to get back after the Christmas break,my friendship group back Monday 13th so am looking forward to seeing everyone after such a long break. the weather. not to bad this week took George out this afternoon even the sun was shining but it has forecast rain tomorrow, a few week ago my friend went out for a meal with a group of friends and won afternoon tea ,so I am going with her tomorrow  it's called the everglades it's a hotel and they have a restaurant as well so it should be nice.think I am out with my daughter and her partner Sunday for dinner she has got some  vouchers off a Sunday lunch in one of our local pubs and it runs out Sunday so we might as well use them up rather than waste them .have a nice weekend regards Syl x

Hi Syl,

Hope you enjoyed your return to the friendship group and also Sunday lumch with your daughter and her partner.  I do enjoy eating out and not having to clear up afterwards!

Weather good here last Friday so after my usual gym routine I got the underground to Kew and spent the day walking for pleasure.  So lovely to be out in the fresh air.  Saturday caught up with stuff around the house and then on Sunday went walking locally in the morning followed by shopping in the afternoon.  So mild for the time of year but expect we will get a cold spell eventually.  Have not even had the heating on for the last few days.

Have been chatting to a good friend who I often go out with and we have booked up a theatre trip in February and also tickets booked for the Chelsea Flower Show this year.  We have been looking at doing the latter for several years and although a bit pricey decided this year we would finally go along.  Work has been quite miserable recently with morale low all round (retail not what it used to be!!) so these things to look forward to are a great boost.

Also just been invited by my daughter and son in law to join them on a mini break to Lincolnshire during the boys' Easter school holidays so managed to get the time off work and really looking forward to spending quality time with them.  I must be doing something right as also seeing them during the February half term (also when both my children have birthdays). Definitely helps keeping busy and having things to do.

Some not so good news though as one of my very close friend's husband has spent the last week in hospital following being taken in by ambulance from his GP's surgery with what they are currently calling urinary sepsis.  They are a train ride away but the hospital is closed to visitors just now due to the novovirus being on various wards.  All I can do is stay in touch by phone and have sent thinking/get well cards too.  Sometimes you just feel helpless in these situations.

Hope the afternoon tea lived up to expectations and that you are keeping okay.  Take care and have a good week.  Jules