Sylvia

My husband died 9 wk ago  my kids are very good  but life isnt the same  now i miss him so much  i just wish he could come back  and let me know he is ok 

Parents
  • Syliva, I am so very sorry for your loss, I know how it feels, my husband passed away in October and I miss him so much, I too wish they could let us know they are ok.  There are lots of people on here going through the same terrible time who will offer support.  Sending love to you Debbie xxxxxx

  • Hi debbie, how are you havnt heard off you in a while i feel ok at the moment health wise ,got to go the hospital next month  to see about my breathing me and the kids just having a quite xmas dinner we will go to the crem  to put flowers on my parents grave ,we will put some flowers in a vase for my hubby ,it is my hubbys birthday on the 27 dec  might go for a walk weather permiting  to a place called spike island my hubby used to like watching the mersey from there .  Take care  have a peaceful xmas  will be thinking of you  Syl x

  • Hi  Jules, glad your nice and busy at work the time passes when your on the go its always good to keep  active .hope your son enjoyed his honeymoon, where did they go?its nice to get away even if its only for a few days me and hubby never had a honeymoon , we moved straight into a flat above a Butchers shop where my hubby worked, when he moved jobs 3yrs later we bought our first house. the weather is awful here as well not took george out this week we have had rain mixed with snow, enjoyed dinner with my son and daughter Sunday , i am going to the crem wednesday  with my sister as it is my mums birthday so will put flowers in her  plot in the grass, hope the weather improves we are going to get  wet  if this rain  carries on. enjoy your week regards Syl x

  • Hi Debbie , glad  your feeling better and you have joined a gym its nice to do things that you enjoy  and gets you fit at the same time, hope you manage to get in the garden, its awful here at the moment with the rain  not took george out for  a few days ,so feel a bit  shut in at the moment , the weather is surpposed to be bad all week, take care  Syl x

  • Hi Syl

    My son and daughter in law enjoyed their 'mini moon'.  They had three days in the Cairngorms at a place called Ballater and spent much of the time walking in the wonderful scenery.  It snowed on their last day and they flew back in the midst of Storm Doris (delayed a few hours) but from the pictures on facebook they had a lovely time.  Not yet spoken to them but they are both back at work now as life returns to usual routine.

    Weather certainly curtailing some of my walks but met a friend out for coffee on Monday and visited Mum and the gym yesterday before having another friend round for the afternoon.  I am into work for the next couple of days and really wish it was nice enough to get among the spring flowers in the garden but still far to wet to do much other than tidy and fill the bird feeders again.  It is supposed to be the first day of the meteorological Spring but looks pretty dull and damp outside.  Poor George will be missing his walkies with you just as much as you do I expect.  At least I am away for a three day break in a week's time so looking forward to that.

    Right, need to wash up before setting up so will send you (and Debbie)  good wishes for a pleasant day. Take cate. Jules xx

  • Hi Jules, glad your son and his new bride enjoyed there  time in Scotland i have never been  but i have heard it is very nice.not doon much at the week end went out for Sunday lunch with the kids , the weather  not to bad at the moment managed to take george out today, havnt been to well again, with my ears this time  at the doctors later on  there seems to be   nothing right with me at the moment , i am also waiting for a scan on my back as well , sorry to sound a bit   miserable  but nothing seems to be going  right  at the moment. enjoy  your week regards Syl x

  • Hi Syl

    I have visited Scotland on a few occasions and many years ago toured for two weeks which was lovely. The scenery in the Highlands is magnificent and we found the hospitality of the people really welcoming.  During our two weeks we suffered car problems(the little local garage opened on a Sunday especially so we could continue our journey) and my hubby even decided to give blood whilst we were visiting Glasgow (there was a mobile unit in town that day!).  Good memories.

    I am sorry that you are under the weather and hope the doctor was able to give you something to help with your ears.  Very painful when you have ear infections.  Hope the appointment comes through for your back scan.  Is this a new problem for you or something you suffer with?    Fingers crossed with the better weather on the way (I live in hope here as it is raining at present) we can all start to feel a little brighter too).

    I had a pretty quiet weekend and as the weather on Sunday was  not nice for walking I decided to take myself to the cinema (spur of the moment idea).  Never been on my own before but really enjoyed the film and will probably do it again when I see something showing that I like.  When the new cinema opens just 15mins walk away this will make it very handy.

    I am due to be going away this Friday with friends which Iam looking forward to though with my Mum being increasingly frail I am a little on tenterhooks each time the phone rings.  With Mum being in a residential home at least I am sure she is in good hands and the palliative care term are now on board to monitor her pain levels which so far have been controllable with a couple of paracetamol.  After Mum's life of mental issues I am finding it more emotional seeing her physical decline and think this is due to the reminders associated with hubby's journey through cancer.  Am off to work shortly which hopefully will help the mind keep busy.

    Take care of yourself and hope the doctor can help.  Jules xx

  • Hi Jules, my problem with my ears has been sorted, you  wont believe it  something had  crawled into my ear in the night, i had to go to A & E while they flushed it out ,i still dont know what it was as far as i could see  it was only wax that came out but it seems ok now.the problem with my back started a couple of week ago i have a scan at the end of the month,  it doesnt seem as bad  since i went the doctors typical isnt it.? I have just had george out for his walk the sun is out here at the moment, getting ready to go over my friends for coffee. Hope you enjoy your break with your friends it does you good  to get away its a nice change away from the normal every day chores  that we do.hope your mum is ok at least she is in good hands let me know  where  your going regards Syl x

  • Hi Syl,

    So pleased that the issue with your ear has been sorted and hope there is no recurrence of an univited guest 'popping in'.  Hopefully the back scan will just confirm that everything has returned to normal by the time your appointment comes around.  A few years ago I had a trapped nerve in my back which was agony and I found it very tiring being on long term painkillers but no other treatment was necessary.

    My weekend away was lovely and was spent in Stratford upon Avon.  Got to the hotel by lunchtime and had a pretty lazy afternoon before joining the rest of the guests for a carvery evening meal followed by disco.  On Saturday my friends and I headed out after a hearty breakfast.  It remained dry and we walked around town and visited the butterfly farm as planned.  Afterwards we stopped for a coffee and cake (lunch) before they headed off to visit Ann Hathaway's Cottage.  I had been there before on a previous visit to the area so went walking by the river as well as taking a mini cruise down it.  Lovely. Popped in for a cuppa at the Royal Shakespeare Company's riverside cafe and then strolled around town before heading back to change for the evening do.  Drinks reception was at 6pm and then banquet and cabaret followed by music/dancing till midnight.  The event raised over £1500 for Prostate Cancer which was brilliant.   We left after another big breakfast this morning and after a cuppa at my friends house I caught the train home. Very enjoyable.  Now catching up with my mail before settling down for a quiet evening.

    Hopefully catching up with my daughter tomorrow.  She has a really nasty inflamation in her eye and has to have drops for 8 weeks with the first week being every 2hrs so will keep her company when she takes her youngest for his jabs in the morning.

    Hope you have had a pleasant weekend. Take care.  Jules xx   

  • Hi Jules, glad you enjoyed your  break me and hubby loved stratford upon avon, we have done all the things  you did  while you were there, it fetched back so many  memories. Hope your daughter is ok with her eyes, my sister has a  few problems with her eyes as well  she goes to the hospital every 3 month for check ups . have felt quite  up set  for a couple of days spent a lot of  time crying been on my own  as well  i dont think that helps, went out for a meal  Sunday  with a few of  the girls i used to work  with i had to force  my self to go but it was nice to catch up with them and i was glad i went  in the end . Not took george out for a few days as his family are away for a few days he has gone to stay  with there dad till they come back,but i have got a bunny rabbit  staying with me at the moment,its a indoor  rabbit its in my living room in a cage  so i am talking to him at the moment lol, he his going back to my daughters  thursday morning there have been to Prague for a few days.i will be going swimming aerobics  later hope i can cheer my self up a bit  and not feel as sad as i have been just  lately  enjoy your week regards Syl x

  • Hi Syl

    Hope you are feeling a little better now.  I do go out whatever the weather  as find this helps a great deal. I have never been one for staying indoors so suppose it's in my nature to have this bit of routine in my life.  I perhaps had the added advantage of spending quite a bit of time on my own even when hubby was alive as he travelled on business sometimes for up to a month at a time over many years.  I do definitely miss the spontineity of conversation though and my friends must think I chat an awful lot when we get together... hope they understand though.  Have also had some inner struggles with my emotions as my Mum is not doing so well and it is hard watching another family member struggling with illness.Just keeping busy to try and cope the best I can.

    Things pretty busy within the family just now as my daughter's house move grows closer.  Should be on the 31st and I will have Zack for the day to keep him out of mischief during the moving day bedlam.  My eldest grandson is going to help!!  At the moment it is a case of trying to keep them as calm as possible.

    Yesterday I took the tube and buses over to spend some time with my daughter in law and Darcey. My son took half days annual leave and after  going out with his camera for a bit then joined us for a lovely walk over the country park (2mins walk from their house).  A couple of hours later and we were enjoying time together. After they settled baby down for the night  we had a home made curry for dinner before  my daughter in law dropped me home (buses stop running early evening where they are and they wont let me get a taxi). This was our first catch up since the wedding so plenty to talk about. Will see them again in a couple of weeks when I have invited them over for lunch.

     

    Today I have done my weekly shopping and now as the sun has broken through may well head out into the garden for a bit. Tomorrow I have daughter and family for a quick lunch so will catch up on all their news then.

    On Monday I am going into London to visit some museums/galleries and have lunch with a friend.  This replaces our planned trip to Cambridge which was cancelled by the operator a week or two back due to lack of numbers.  Hopefully will do it in the future but may go by train now that we both have Rail Saver cards.

    Well have rambled on long enough so hope you are enjoying your weekend. Take care. Jules xx

  • Hi  Jules, glad your ok  and you enjoyed time with your family over the week end,sorry your mum isnt  to well at the moment, its awful when parents  become unwell  and  there is nothing you can do to help them, i know  the feeling with both my mum and dad. you sound as if your  fliting about here and there you sound that busy you are going to meet your self coming back LOL, i think it does you good  to keep busy , sometimes i feel quite lonely with not enough  to fill the void in my life since hubby died. have had a cry again this week end i cant seem to move on  just lately , also its my weddimg anniversary  on the 21st  we would have been married 47 yrs it seems a life time ago now. went to my daughters yesterday for my sunday dinner it was very nice she is comeing down later to fetch me a chocolate pudding she made  yesterday  so i will have it after my tea. my son is in Reading today just for the day then tomorrow he is in London again just for the day,hope you enjoy  your day in London,its a long time since i was in the capital im  surmising you dont live far from London. I havnt had george out for a  while as the weather isnt good at the moment, and its  forecast more rain  this week and its going to be cold as well. Regards  Syl x

Reply
  • Hi  Jules, glad your ok  and you enjoyed time with your family over the week end,sorry your mum isnt  to well at the moment, its awful when parents  become unwell  and  there is nothing you can do to help them, i know  the feeling with both my mum and dad. you sound as if your  fliting about here and there you sound that busy you are going to meet your self coming back LOL, i think it does you good  to keep busy , sometimes i feel quite lonely with not enough  to fill the void in my life since hubby died. have had a cry again this week end i cant seem to move on  just lately , also its my weddimg anniversary  on the 21st  we would have been married 47 yrs it seems a life time ago now. went to my daughters yesterday for my sunday dinner it was very nice she is comeing down later to fetch me a chocolate pudding she made  yesterday  so i will have it after my tea. my son is in Reading today just for the day then tomorrow he is in London again just for the day,hope you enjoy  your day in London,its a long time since i was in the capital im  surmising you dont live far from London. I havnt had george out for a  while as the weather isnt good at the moment, and its  forecast more rain  this week and its going to be cold as well. Regards  Syl x

Children
  • Hi Syl

    Been another busy and emotional week. Mum is frail and now more or less confined to bed (refusing the hoist to move her to a chair for a change).She is sleeping a lot but still eating three meals a day.Pain meds seem to be keeping her comfortable and the care home staff are wonderful.  My daughter came to visit with me on Tuesday though Mum is not talking to anyone now. We got the occasional nod but very sad really.

    My daughter andfamily should have been moving  next week but unfortunately they have come across a problem and this needs to be sorted for the purchase to continue.  We are all keeping our fingers crossed that it willbe sorted before the seller decides to put it back on the market again especially as my grandson has already been on a visit to the propsosed new school.  There have been many tears over the last few days but now allwe can do is wait and see if the solicitors can iron out the issues. Why cannot life be good for our youngsters for a change.

    Hopefully the improving weather means that George has had your company for walks.  Getting through anniversary dates is always an emotional time and the tears do bring temporary relief.  Had my hubby still be here, he would have been 66 on 2nd April. I will take flowers to his resting place.

    Well just waiting for a quote to come through to see if Ican manage to up date the bathroom on a budget!!  This will hopefully give me focus in the summer in between getting back intothe garden.  Lovely out there today and mowed the lawn and did a bit of tidying up. My son and family are coming tolunch tomorrow so off to make apple crumble and prepare the veg now as will pop to see Mum tomorrow morning after my gym visit and before the family arrive. Keeping busy is the best way I know of getting on  with life; it is certainly what hubby would expect of me.

    My trip into London went well (it only takes about 45mins on the tube) and my friend and I went to visit the Chelsea Pensioners Hospital, Museum and Gardens as well as having lunch at their cafe.  We had morning coffee on the Kings Road and managed to dodge a couple of little showers.  We now have a list of other places to visit when we go next.  My next planned visit to London is when the Tall Ships are at Greenwich in April  (Easter Weekend) so am looking forward to that.

    Take care and enjoy the sunshine.  Jules xx

     

  • Hi Jules,  i must have just followed you on to the forum glad you enjoyed your trip to London  its a goog job you wasnt there on that  awful day  on wednesday my son only just missed it ,he was there tuesday, i dispair of humans thats why i love animals so much, cant understand the awful things  we do to one another. Sorry your mum isnt to good at the moment, its all part and parcel of growing old we all have to face it eventually,im sure your daughter  will get things sorted with the house ,these little nigles seem to happen a lot  when  you buy  a property but most things get sorted in the end.you still havnt said  if you live not far from London,have been out for a cream tea today with my friend to a local community centre it was very nice, i had 4 cakes and  sandwiches i cant believe i eaten 4 cakes they were yummy, but they didnt do much for my waist line lol.the kids are taking me out for dinner tomorrow for mothers day to a country pub called the Stretton fox its very nice have been a few times before.  Enjoy your lunch  with your son regards Syl x

  • Hi Syl

    Hope u enjoy your dinner treat. I love country pubs as you can also have a good walk to enjoy the surroundings.

    As to where I  live in relation to central London, I am in Middlesex

    which is classed as greater London and about 30 mins drive outside the capital. Before I married I lived in NW London and worked in the west end, a Londoner born and bred.Hubby was also born in London though moved to Middlesex as a 3 yr old and we met on a blind date. Those were the days!

    Just waiting for the gym to open so will be out walking soon in the sunshine. Hopefully a day  in the garden tomorrow as weather  looks promising and want to get the borders weeded. Take care. Jules xx

  • Hi Jules, thought i would  e mail you before week end, my mothers day lunch was lovely then we went the crem to put flowers  on  my mums  grave i also put some flowers in a vase for my mum in law . Dont think i am doing much at the week end i have got my daughters rabbit again as she has gone to Amsterdam for a few days  with her partner, she goes to America  next week end  for  three week ,i am a born worrier so i will  be on pins while she is away ,I am also meeting my sons new girlfriend tomorrow he got divorced 2 years ago the  relationship is quite new  but he seems happy and thats all you  wont for them  to be happy.the weather is good at the moment , but its forecast rain  tomorrow if it stays dry  will  do the garden take care and have a nice week end  regards Syl x

  • Hi Syl

    Glad you enjoyed your Mother's Day.  Good day for me too with both children and families popping in.

    I then developed a rotten throat and still have the tickly cough which is a nuisance.

    We had a rabbit many years ago (along with two guinea pigs!!). Bet you enjoy caring for him whilst your daughter enjoyed Amsterdam.  Would love to go back there myself one day as we visited with friends during a three day visit. Plenty still to see and do.  Would be good to get back to taking a city break now I have the time.

    Must be lovely to see your son finding a new partner and hope the get together was a good one. Nothing better than seeing your children being happy and content.

    With the better weather have  been busy getting the garden ready for a relaxing summer. So far most of the weeding done now and I have mowed the lawn a couple more times. Over the weekend it was hubby's birthday so after laying flowers I took myself on a long walk , had coffee in the sunshine and then popped into the garden centre on the way home.

    Today as it has been another lovely day I spoke to my daughter and we took the boys to the Country Park  as it is the first day of the Easter school hols and with their house move postponed  for now, needed to get our minds elsewhere.  Ended up playing football for an hour or two followed by a walk as well as having lunch at the cafe.  When I got home I mowed the lawn as apparently we may have some showers tomorrow. 

    Am going to the cinema on Wednesday evening with my daughter as she has a 2 for 1 deal.

    Well had better get rest of my mail done before sorting my evening meal (veggies to prepare).

    Take care and hope all is well with you.  Jules xx

  • Hi Jules, glad  you enjoyed  mothers day with your children its nice when you all get together,  my sons new partner seems very nice , she has to children   a boy and  girl  there  dad  died  about 9 yrs ago when they were only young  so they dont remember him . I was on my own Sunday  ,i felt upset all day and had  a good cry i even  went to the garden centre just to get out of the house, but when i got there they were   lineing up to get on the car park so i came straight back, and to  top it off i  had to go and have my breathing checked  everything is ok i start  going to exercise class  next month so i walked into my local town ,went into a few shops then went into M and S for a sandwich and a cup of tea caught the bus home,  when i got back i had lost my phone , all the pictures of my hubby  and our lovely dog red gone.i havnt stopped crying since ,i have rung all the places i have been no one has handed it in, my son rang my number and the phone had been switched off, why cant people  just hand things in  when they find them  instead of taking them. Sorry to feel so glum  but  thats how i feel at the moment, the sun is shining at the moment so i am going to force my self to take george out take care  have a good week Syl x

  • Oh Syl so sad to read that you have lost your phone with all those memories on too. Hope you reported it straight to the phone provider to stop whoever has it from hacking it and racking up another bill.  I expect you checked with the local police station to see if it had been handed in. I am not surprised you feel so glum.Sending a big hug your way.  I suppose now you will have to get yourself a new one too; so annoying.

    On the plus side am delighted that your breathing check went well and i am sure you will enjoy the exercise classes when they begin to.  As well as helping this will provide some social time as well.

    I have just got back from visiting my Mum who is still laid up in her bed at the residential home and showing no interest in life at all bless her. They had just  given her her breakfast before i arrived andI was able to get an up to date progress report.  They really would like the occupational therapist to be able to help her with an exercise routine but she is not willing to undergo any kind of 'life prolonging' treatment so spends her day lying down apart from when she has her meals.  It must be so hard for her butI am grateful at the caring staff that see to her needs.  After I left her I went to the gym (helps me unwind as well as keep fit) before coming home about an hour ago.  So now need to fix some lunch and will probably potter in the garden afterwards.

    Tomorrow night my daughter and I go to the cinema so am looking forward to that especially as I have work tomorrow and it is bound to be busy with Easter approaching.

    Take care of yourself and hope you begin to feel a little better soon.  Hugs  Jules

  • Hi Jules, thought i would  e- mail you before week end still no word on my phone, rang the police and all the shops but no luck cancelled with my network as well, went into town and bought my self a second hand phone, but have got to wait  for a sim card to arrive.my son is going to put new photos of hubby and our lovely staffy on my new phone when the sim arrives. I have also got photos and vedeos on my tablet as well,its just the thought that some one wasnt honest and handed it in .my daughter is away now for 3 wk she meet up with the group in L A will keep in touch with her on my tablet for now,i have also got her itenary so i know where she is,i am going out on sunday with my son and his girlfriend and her children i am a bit nervous meeting them for the first time hope it goes ok.sorry your mum is still under the weather all you can do is make sure she is well looked after. what filmdid you see the last film i went to was Brigit jones baby with my daughter nice film. have a nice week end regards Syl x

  • Hi Syl

    Such a shame about your phone.  So much depend on them these days. Hopefully your new sim will arrive soon and your son can get some lovely photos transferred over for you.  I do not have pictures of hubby on my phone as did not have a decent camera facility on the one I had when he was alive.  Upgraded just after he passed away but still prefer my  Canon camera when doing photography.  Phone camera comes in handy when taken unawares and need to take a shot.  Have saved all my photos to the computer and then onto a spare SD card just in case the laptop gives up again.

    How lovely that you can keep in touch with your daughter whilst she is on holiday.  Do you remember when we used to go away and never bother calling home (before the mobile phone of course!!). I suppose when I go away in June I had better report my safe arrival ha ha.

    Hope you enjoy meeting your son's girlfiend and family and am sure it will all go fine. You must be delighted to see  him finding happiness again.

    I went out with my daughter and the boys to a Country Park in Herts yesterday and then today because the weather was so wonderful I took myself off to Kew Gardens for the day. Six hours of pure pleasure in beautiful surroundings and only an hour away by public transport.

    Will need to catch up with shopping/gym and housework tomorrow but have also had an invite a a friends for a BBQ with good weather promised again. Will see how I  feel after my exercise today.

    The film was Beauty and the Beast and my daughter and I really enjoyed it.  Have signed up for the cinema newsletter so I can get advance notifications of forthcoming films as quite handy to go when the weather is not so good. My daughter has also been taking the boys to Kids Club cinema during the Easter holidays.

    Stay well, take care, Jules x

  • Hi jules , thought i would catch up with you before Easter, had a nice day out with my son , his girlfriend and her children, we went to a place called Walton Gardens its a local park with swings, a minature zoo a grazy golf and a small walk in the grounds, i enjoyed it , then we had  a meal in one  of the local pubs. Glad you enjoyed the cenema with you daughter its nice to go out with the kids now and again,havnt heard off my daughter for a couple of days she is in one of the national parks for a few days so there wont be any reception ,hope to hear off her soon as i will start to worry.i dont think i told you i had a x ray on my back  last week i have been geting back ache the doctor rang me i have got arthritis in my spine, but its not to bad at the moment so dont need to do anything for now.glad you enjoyed  kew gardens  i have heard of it from the TV.we have a nice one not far from where i live its called Bents .dont know what im doing over the weak end think i am going out for dinner sunday with my sister have a lovely easter dont eat to many  easter eggs regards Syl x