my wife died within 6 weeks of being told i gave her the drugs when i was told and when she was in pain but not once in that time did i say i love you or have long talks with her my son was seventeen at the time and he said as long as my mum remembers me every day i will be happy one day she called me from the other room and i said i am doing the ironing and she said i just wondered where you was why did i not stop doing the ironing and go and sit with her near the end i was sitting with her and 3 times she called my name and 3 times i said my sons name remembering what he had said earlier so when he came home from work she would say hes name but that was the last words she said
I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through. We all grieve differently. I think you could benefit from some counselling. Something as complex as guilt would probably be best being worked through with a professional. Personally, I don't think you have anything to feel guilty about. It's completely normal to go over events and question whether you (general) have done enough. It doesn't matter whether the guilt is justified or not, it's how you feel and that can't be ignored. You can't go on like this, it's not fair on yourself. My thoughts are with you and your son.
I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through. We all grieve differently. I think you could benefit from some counselling. Something as complex as guilt would probably be best being worked through with a professional. Personally, I don't think you have anything to feel guilty about. It's completely normal to go over events and question whether you (general) have done enough. It doesn't matter whether the guilt is justified or not, it's how you feel and that can't be ignored. You can't go on like this, it's not fair on yourself. My thoughts are with you and your son.
