Hi Georgia,

It's always tough to lose someone close to you especially when you have relatively little idea that it's going to happen.

Difficult to know without knowing the people involved but some people do tend to put on a "tough" act when they are feeling rather emotional especially men who have an ide of masculinity that involves not displaying an emotional response and "manning up". It might be that your father is one of these and feels a lot more griefstriken by his step-mothers death than you think and this is causing his irritability and insensitive behaviour towards you - a bit of a defense mechanism because he needs space.

Definately talk to the school - if you have exams coming up you will definitely get this taken into consideration.

I've found that grief is a bit of an ambush predator and creeps up on you when you're not expecting it. I've found that the important thing is to try not to let it get a hold. When you feel yourself getting drawn into thinking about it, get up and do something else. Develop strategies of things that you can do when it happens, whether that's go for a walk or make a cup of tea or phone a friend or some job it'll be up to you but the important thing is not to sit and stew - don't give into it because it just amplifies and builds until you have a complete meltdown.

In time you'll be able to think of her with affection and love but clearly right now thinking of her and what happened is something you're not currently equipped to do and not thinking about her is not in some way dishonest to her memory - it's your coping strategy

Good luck with the healing process