Thanks for your reply cg, sorry took so long to reply but sometimes it's too distressing to come on this site there is so much sadness and I find my self searching through trying to find someone with the exact circumstances as me but I know everyone's experience is different. Hope you are doing ok xxxxxx

Hi Deban so sorry for your loss I lost my husband 3 years ago to terminal prostate cancer when he finally found out he was just devastated he told me he couldn't bare to leave me this way but I assured him I would be fine. He looked fine until the last 5 days of his life then he went down rapidly and the cancer just kept spreading and spreading even though he was terminal and he was in agony even the pain killers were not helping. I spent nights upon nights by his side at hospital and at my age it was a struggle to not have sleep and food I found he stress was causing me headaches etc and then he passed away but I was glad more than anything cause he was out of pain and at rest. At the funeral I was hysterical though and I promised I would keep it together. Anyway take care hope to hear from you -Diane X

Diane, I am so sorry  for your loss, and thank you for your message.  I also promised my husband I would be ok but I'm not I just miss him more and more as time passes.  He was always very brave  and did not want to die in agony so in some ways the fall granted him that, I do have a lot  of support but live on my own and I just miss having my best friend to do stuff or do nothing with.  How are you coping 3 years on and how did you cope in the early days xxxx

Diane, I am so sorry  for your loss, and thank you for your message.  I also promised my husband I would be ok but I'm not I just miss him more and more as time passes.  He was always very brave  and did not want to die in agony so in some ways the fall granted him that, I do have a lot  of support but live on my own and I just miss having my best friend to do stuff or do nothing with.  How are you coping 3 years on and how did you cope in the early days xxxx

Hi Deban, yeah I just couldn't cope at all in the early days we did everything together and then half of me was gone. I was constantly hysterical the first few months I couldn't keep my emotions under control. And as time passes I my self miss him more I look at photos on the wall in the house and I burst into tears. Yes I have lots of support as well but I also live my self and I can relate I don't have that best friend to do things with. My daughter and sons are there quite a lot for me also the grandkids. Then I was diagnosed last year with liver cancer and I struggled the most going through cancer not having him there. You can have all the support you want but when the one person you only want is gone it makes me so upset. But I am still fighting it luckily it's under control and down to one chemo a week. -Diane Xx