Hello All, 

I have just found this site and would like to share my story with you all.. 

In January 2014 our lives were turned upside down when my father was given the devastating news that he had terminal cancer.  He was told that he could not be cured but there was treatment he could have to give him quality of life.  He received seven treatments of chemotherapy at Barts Hospital and in July 2014 he was given great news – the chemotherapy had worked and his cancer had shrunk to such a degree that they placed him on a “watch and see” programme.  We were overjoyed at this news and it was great to have Dad back to looking well and enjoying life.  However in November 2014 it was discovered that the cancer had travelled to his brain.  We were told that this only happened in 8% of patients with esophageal cancer.  The first time we received the news that Dad had terminal cancer was bad but the second time you hear this it is worse!  He had to have an operation to put a drain in because the tumour was stopping the flow over his brain.  The operation went well and there then followed 10 sessions of radiotherapy which went on all over Christmas – the last session was on New Year’s Eve.  Dad was very brave through all this and was positive in spirit.  However as a result of the radiotherapy the scar on his head from the operation became infected and he was admitted to hospital for a further operation when the wound was cleaned and the infection cleared.  He was released from the London Hospital but was only home for a matter of hours when he had a seizure – my mum called us all and an ambulance crew were with him when he had his second seizure.  It was frightening to see this but nothing could prepare us for the further 40 seizure he had over the next few days in Whipps Cross Hospital.  He was a fighter and despite all the odds he managed to survive these and was released home once again at the end of January.  We treated each day as a blessing and Dad thought that the worse was now over – he was not dying from cancer but living with it.  His battles were not over and it was discovered in April that the cancer had now spread down his spine and he underwent further radiotherapy in May.  Once again this radiotherapy caused the head wound to become infected and he was once again admitted to the London for treatment on this wound.  He came home from the London on the 15th May.  He was however now unable to walk very far and although a stair lift had been installed he became too weak to use this and the dining room was converted into a bedroom.  Each day Dad grew weaker but he still remained hopeful that he would win the battle he was fighting.  His body grew tired and he lost the use of legs completely.  Never once complaining and always trying to protect us from the worry that we all felt, he always had a smile and a friendly chat to the carers who were helping Mum to look after him.  He was a truly nice guy, a gentleman and loved by everyone who knew him.

My Dad passed away on the 19th June, at home, surrounded by his family.  He fought his battle bravely and was ever hopeful that he would live for many years.  My Dad was my hero, a true gentleman, one of life’s good guys.  It was whilst he was at home during the last weeks of his life that he was offered and received the amazing help, care and assistance from St. Clare’s Hospice at Home.  This is a new division of the Hospice that helps families like mine to keep their loved ones at home.  

My dad shines with me in all that I do, I miss him every waking minute of the day. I dont know how i deal with the pain and how my family do but help and advice is always welcome. 

I look forward to hearing from you