Hi All

My Mum passed away 03.04.15-she had primary breast cancer, bone cancer and it had spread to her liver amongst other places.  She was first disgnosed in 2012, but has never had a stay in hospital.  She was very fit and healthy, up until a week before she died-she called me on the Monday, and asked me to come down and pick her up and take her to hospital.  On the Wednesday, myself and my brother met with her oncologist (who we had met before) and she told us Mum wouldn't be coming home.  She said that very rarely, people with cancer go downhill extremely quickly and that Mum had a couple of weeks left.  Mum died on the Friday after just 4 nights in hospital.

I am having a lot of difficulty accepting that someone can be fine one day (my Mum lived alone, babysat my 2 year old niece exactly a week before she died), and a week later be dead.  I am finding myself starting to think that the doctors failed her in some way?  Although I know that this is probably unfair.

When the cancer spread to her bones, we knew that it was uncureable, but thought that she had much longer thn she had.  I know that she thought that too, and I now I feel like I missed out on having the "big" or "important" chats with her.  I was with her when she died, and of course I am glad that her suffering wasn't drawn out-she would have hated a long stay in hospital.

I keep researching what happens when the body starts to shut down, and as I said, I can't accept that she went downhill so quickly, which is making it difficult to come to terms with it, and grieve properly without being so angry.  Has anyone else felt like this? xx