we were told today that my dads cancer has spread, don’t know primary source because he had a couple but now in lung, stomach, bladder, liver and nodes around osophegus! Last two days he’s slept and not eating ! He couldn’t make his consultant appointment so I went to collect the results! Consultant said because of his rapid decline he may only have weeks! 
what does that mean?! I’m not ready for this , I don’t know how to be in this world without him! 
im angry and I can’t stop breaking down- he is like a skeleton and I can’t bare to see him go through this ! It’s just so quick ! Consultant put in urgent referral for some nursing support at home but how long does this take? We want to keep him at home in his own bed but don’t know if this is even possible ! 
I’m dreaming about him and waking up early hours crying !